Page 19 of Dangerous Liaisons

“Fuck me,” I whisper to myself.

***

We've been in the ocean a little while. Watching the fish and the life on the reef is exceptional, but it's hard to relax. Leilani has been giving me glances since she woke up this morning. I'm going to have to rip off the band-aid and tell her. It feels so fucking awkward now, and I was trying to avoid that shit so we could have a great day. Leilani motions to me, and I see her swimming toward the shore. I follow. When we get to the shallows, I take off the mask and mouthpiece and walk up to the beach. My eyes are locked on the sway of her hips, loving her exposed skin. Her bathing suit is bright pink and hugs her curves like a second skin.

“That was amazing.” I smile.

“What is up with you, Simon?” Leilani frowns, plopping onto the sand, tossing her headgear beside her. She arranges her hair over her shoulder, smoothing it down.

“What do you mean?” I say, dumbly.

“You've been tense all day. Did you really enjoy that?” Leilani asks.

“I did enjoy it. This whole trip has been amazing.”

“Yeah, okay. You might be able to convince someone else that what you just said is true, but I can sense something is off. Just tell me, already.” She watches me closely.

I sit down beside her not sure where to begin. “I don't know how to say this, so I'm just going to be blunt.” I pause.

“Out with it, already,” she hits me on the shoulder.

“I'm leaving Hawai’i as soon as I can,” I say without taking a breath.

Leilani just stares at me, saying nothing. I just sit, watching her watch me.

“Okay and?” she finally says.

I seriously don't know what to say. I can't stand watching those penetrating eyes, so I turn my gaze to the horizon. There is a sailboat in the distance.

“I needed you to know. I really like you, and this time with you has been incredible.”

“Oh, I see. You're worried I'll be a world-class clinger.”

I look back at her and notice her shoulders are shaking with laughter. I'm a little offended, honestly. Shit, all my relationships up to this point have been casual. I hook up for a bit, maybe hang out, but it's no surprise to anyone if I bail or if the girl does. Of course, none of those girls were virgins. I don't fucking know if there is a different rule book for girls who've waited this long to have sex.

“Are you done?” I ask, getting more annoyed.

“Look, Simon, I don't know what you're so worried about? This isn't the olden days, and I expect you to marry me. I'm having fun and just going with it. I'm not that girl who expects you to love her forever,” Leilani says, pulling her knees up to her chest.

“But I have to ask why you've waited to have sex?”

“Wow! Am I some hopeless spinster at twenty-three years old?” Leilani shakes her head and rolls her eyes.

I don't have anything I can say to that comment, so I just wait.

“I've not been saving myself. I've just not met anyone I cared to get close to before. And when I say close, I don't mean until death do us part. I just mean in general. You may not have noticed, but I’m not the easiest to get to know.” She smiles.

Returning her smile, I say, “fair enough.”

Leilani moves and kisses me. I don’t even hesitate to kiss her back.

“Let's forget about earlier. Want to go surfing after lunch?” I ask, getting to my feet.

“Sure,” she says as I hug her, loving the feel of her body next to mine.

Chapter 16

Leilani

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