Page 109 of Blood Bound (Blood Mafia 3)

Chapter Twenty-Two

Demi

I don’t speak until we pass through the portal and return to San Francisco. My hands tremble the entire way through the cave. I almost trip three times. The only reason I don’t fall into the white sap is Evelyn’s strong grasp on my arm.

Before she can leave, I touch Nicole’s arm.

“Can we talk?”

Her lips are pressed into a firm line and the skin around her eyes is tight. She’s trying hard not to show her feelings. We step away from the group. They can hear every word we say, but the false sense of privacy helps me work up the nerve to say what I need to.

“I’m sorry for your loss.”

Nicole’s eyes mist and she nods. “Maria had many flaws. She didn’t know how to be the mother you needed when you were little. She left you when she should have brought you home. I won’t ask you to forgive her, but you need to know Maria wanted nothing but happiness for you. When she learned X was in trouble, she left without asking for anyone else’s help.”

“You followed her?”

She nods. “It’s what friends do. Sometimes you have to watch those closest to you screw up, because you can’t teach them life’s lessons. Other times, you can help. This time I helped.” Nicole swallows.

Other times, you can help.

Glancing over my shoulder, I see my friends waiting near the brick wall. Kerberos is gone and with him the portal. Colt, Grayson, and Mateo are huddled together, whispering something about Mazzikin. I block them out because I’m not ready to face the consequences of my actions yet. Evelyn, Zander, and X are looking in my direction, carefully watching my interaction with Nicole.

I’ve been such a selfish asshole.

Rage has been my constant companion these last few months and I can’t seem to shake its grip on me.

Mateo didn’t ask to be saved, he didn’t demand I sell a piece of my soul. He wanted to die rather than see me make the deal. He’s been trying to make things better, like he promised, and I’ve been fighting him every step of the way. I see it now.

“How do you deal with the hunter rage?” I whisper the question. “It’s… overwhelming.” I run my fingers over my father’s necklace.

Nicole surprises me by wrapping her arms around me. She pats my head as though she’s trying to comfort me. She’s the one who lost her best friend. I hardly knew Maria. I’m sad, of course, but I should be the one comforting her.

“It’ll pass. The first year of being a hunter is not without its peaks and valleys. You have to find what balances you. Don’t let the anger control you, you control the anger. Maria taught me that.” Her voice catches on my mother’s name.

I squeeze her. “Are you going to be okay? Do you want to come home with me?”

Stepping out of the hug, Nicole shakes her head and wipes her wet cheeks with the back of her hand. “No. I need to return to the compound.”

“Will you let me know when you make it home?” I bite my lip. I haven’t asked someone to text me they’re safe in such a long time.

She gives me a watery smile and cups my cheek with her hand. “Of course.” Then she heads to tell X and Zander goodbye.

* * *

Mateo

We arrive home late. Blaze is lingering in the city. Were it any other night, I’d hunt him down and toss him out of San Francisco by the scruff of his neck.

Demi needs me tonight. She may not realize it yet, but she’s keeping too much bottled up. Her conversation with Nicole was the tip of the iceberg. Buried deep inside Demi is an overwhelming amount of guilt and shame; the emotions strangle our bond in a vice grip.

On the elevator ride to take X home, Evelyn asks Colt and Grayson for help with something I know she doesn’t need help with. They both check with me first, and I nod, letting them know I understand what Evelyn’s doing.

Demi’s too lost in her thoughts to notice when the doors open. Everyone climbs out. X and Zander head to their apartment, while my men and sister go to Colt’s.

“Will you come with me?”

My question draws her gaze to me, and her face clears. She looks around, widening her eyes when she notices everyone is gone.

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