Page 86 of Chosen Road

My brows snapped together. Suddenly, I felt offended. “You want me to be your booty call?” I asked incredulously.

She looked up and her eyes darted back and forth between mine. “Yes. No. Never mind,” she huffed, flustered.

I relaxed as I saw my way forward. “I can do that. On one condition.”

She looked surprised, and then suspicious. “What is it?”

“You let me take you out on dates.”

She looked completely taken aback. She opened her mouth to speak but I cut her off.

“That’s the only deal I’m offering, Amber. I’m giving you my heart, but I’m not going to allow you to cut it up into tiny pieces.”

Her mouth dropped open. “You’re using sex to get me back!”

‘Of course, I am. And Amber? Those are my toys. You don’t play with them without me.”

Amber

Well, that escalated quickly.

I went up to find my toys and leave a letter for Gus, came down with no toys, a date, and a fuck buddy. No, not a fuck buddy. An ex-husband with benefits? No, he wasn’t my ex. I guess he was a husband with benefits, which is really just a husband. My husband.

What the hell just happened? I laughed to myself a little on my way home.

We kept our sex toys on the top shelf in our walk-in closet, but they weren’t there. I checked the drawers and the nightstand drawer, and they, too, were devoid of vibrators and dildos. I knew Yiayia wouldn’t venture upstairs, but I wasn’t sure what time Gus would be home and I didn’t want him to catch me in the act.

I was only going to take one small vibrator on the off chance he checked the box. Why he would check the box I had no idea, but I was taking no chances.

With my head half under the bed, I fumbled with my cell phone flashlight in case I was missing anything. Where the hell were they? Why would he move them?

When he called my name and I popped up and bashed my head, it only added to the embarrassment of being caught.

Then he grinned. All my thoughts of wanting my toys went out the window at the effect his dimple had on my libido. After years of holding my words inside, I blurted out exactly why I was looking for my toys, and he somehow jumped to the conclusion that I wanted to move on to someone else.

The look on his face hurt my heart, so I immediately strove to put him out of his misery by telling him I missed sex with him, not that I wanted it with anyone else and he mistook it as a proposition.

I laughed, and then snorted. He had me completely flustered. Before I could explain, he’d already moved on to his counteroffer of dating.

This intrigued me. To start over. To date. To get to know one another again. To have a chance to put the past behind us. As he went on to discuss the ‘deal’, I realized he was using sex to lure me back! I mean, I always said his dick was a magic wand, but this was too funny. He was baiting me, Amber, with sex. I snorted with laughter.

Poor man. I would have gladly gone out with him. I had been working myself up to asking him to spend time together. My anger and humiliation were dissipating, albeit slowly, under his care and attention. His touch no longer sent images of him with Jacqueline spinning into my brain, although I still struggled fighting them off at other times.

It hit me that she was not the only one. Other women in the past, a client, someone else’s assistant, and a co-worker, who showed interest in him had triggered similar thoughts, though nothing ever came of their interest in him.

It gratified me that they were losing their power, in any case. I wasn’t sure if sex might trigger them, but it looked like I was going to find out.

I laughed out loud in the car. I had a date with my husband in exchange for him giving me sex.

I sobered. I didn’t want his heart in tiny pieces, I wanted him whole.

I wished I’d given him my letter.

Chapter 27: Dear Angus

Gus

Amber’s car was not in the driveway, but an envelope with my name in her handwriting peeked out of the mailbox.

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