Page 16 of Single Girl Rules #ThreeHeadedMonster

So now we’re pretending like last night never happened? And when did a sample become half the book? Interesting… “Technically it will be an orgy if three of us are with three guys.”

Ash looked around and then shushed me. “Can you be a little quieter? I think people are starting to stare. And anyway…you’re here with your fiancé!”

“Correction…boyfriend. And what’s your point? Single Girl Rule #8 is still in effect. And according to The Towel Drop’s patented bulge analysis technology, Master Hung is at least 8 inches.”

“No, no,” said Slavanka. “Asian penis small.”

“I thought that was just a myth,” said Ash.

“Not according to science. One study I saw found that the average guy from Congo is 7.1 inches. While the average in China is only 4.2 inches. Honestly, both of those are a little sad. But at least 7.1 inches is a better starting point.”

“So Master Hung has a little baby penis then?” asked Ash. “I think The Towel Drop may need to recalibrate their bulge analyzer.”

“Nope. He’s half black and half Asian. Could you really not tell that from his last run? The man has the focus of a Buddhist monk combined with the sheer physical dominance of a Zulu warlord.”

“Wow, yeah. I don’t know how I missed that,” said Ash. “Seriously though…this is all made up, right? There can’t really be a website called The Towel Drop that’s all about football players’ dicks.”

Where did sassy Ash come from all of a sudden? Maybe she was getting dehydrated from sweating so much thinking about what these big strong football players were gonna do to us.

I grabbed my phone and pulled up The Towel Drop. I scrolled down a bit to the article titled: “Is Master Hung really hung?”

I was gonna pass my phone to her, but the crowd started cheering. I looked up just in time to see Master Hung jump clean over a defender and then plow through another into the endzone.

I jumped up from my seat, cheering like a wild woman. There was no way he’d be able to ignore my underboob.

He glanced over at me for a second, but then he got swarmed by his teammates.

“Okay. I admit, that jump was pretty hot,” said Ash.

“So you’re in for the orgy?”

“No!”

“Oh, I know what’s going on. You want all of them for yourself. You’re trying to tackle Single Girl Rule #28: All girls should try at least one threesome. I’ll be honest, Ash, I’m not sure you’re ready for that rule yet. It’s farther down on the list for a reason."

"I'm not invoking Single Girl Rule #28. I don’t want that. I don’t even want it with just Master Hung. He’s way too thick for my taste.”

“Too thick? What does that even mean? Also…what makes you think his cock is so thick?” I tilted my head to try to see what she was seeing.

“I was talking about his thighs. Look at those things! They’re like…each the size of my torso.”

“Yeah they are. The Towel Drop doesn’t reveal what metrics go into their bulge analyzer, but I’ve been suspecting for a while that thigh size might indicate a nice girthy cock.”

“That’s a real shame,” said Ash. “If it were long and thin then I’d totally be in.”

Ooh. Sassy Ash had suddenly turned into horny Ash. I was wondering when that little sip of banana juice she’d taken would kick in. “Then I have just the man for you. Ash, meet Flash Robinson. Part two of the three headed monster.” I pointed to Flash. And when Ash looked at him, her jaw literally dropped. Because unlike Master Hung…Flash’s penis size wasn’t a mystery.

“It’s like he’s smuggling a water bottle in his pants,” whispered Ash.

I nodded. “It’s not exactly thin. But it’s definitely long like you requested.”

“What’s long?” asked Chad. He handed me two plain hotdogs - just meat and bread. My tits were gonna love these.

“Nothing,” said Ash. “Nothing is long. I mean, I’m sure someone’s penis is long. But that wasn’t what I was requesting to be long. I just wanted a nice, long…”

“Hot dog,” I said. I picked one up out of the bun and slapped Ash in the face with it.

“Oh God,” she said, trying to dodge it. “It’s so long. Just like I requested.”

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