Susan looked up at me for help.

“Stuffed animals,” I mouthed silently at her.

“Right. Stuffies. I’d love to see your collection,” Susan said.

“Okay.” Scarlett slipped her hand into Susan’s and pulled her to the stairs.

“And you’ll be good for your grandma, Uncle Rob, Aunt Daphne, Aunt Melissa, Uncle Josh, and Ellen?” I called after Scarlett.

“Yes.” She said it as more of a question than a statement.

I didn’t feel comfortable leaving her with just James’ mother. Not yet. Maybe one day in the future, but that day wasn’t today. James had insisted that Scarlett stay here in the city. Something about our apartment in Newark not being suitable for children. He did have a point. It was more of a sexy bachelor pad than a nice family home. Tons of sharp corners. Nothing was toddler-proof in the slightest.

So we had brought in reinforcements. Ellen was already here, which was a relief because Scarlett already viewed her as a grandmother. Rob, Daphne, and Sophie were on their way here to help. Melissa and Josh were exhausted from taking care of her last night. And I was pretty sure Melissa was still scrubbing the makeup off her face that Scarlett had applied. Besides, Rob wanted to introduce Daphne to her mother-in-law anyway. And Sophie to her new grandma. They could have a little reunion while we were away.

“You all set?” James asked.

“Mhm. Are you sure you don’t want to bring her with us though?”

“It’ll be good for her to get acquainted with my mother. Besides, we need some alone time. I have a lot to catch you up on.”

I looked up at him. He basically just said, “We need to talk.” I was about to ask him what he meant, but Scarlett rushed back into the room.

“Bye, Daddy.” She flung herself into his arms.

He peppered her face with kisses, sending her into a fit of giggles. When he set her down she looked up at me.

“Bye, Mommy.” She squinted her eyes at me. “Promise you’ll come back?”

I knelt down and hugged her. “I promise, Scar.”

“And you promise to bring Liam home? I’ve been waiting for him to see his room.”

“I promise.” I squeezed her tightly. I promise, baby girl.

***

“Let’s head back to our place,” James said. “Dr. Hughes needs some time to go over the lab results. He won’t know anything until morning.”

All day long I had been in a fit of nerves. First the helicopter ride. I had ended up getting engrossed enough in the story I had written to make the trip go faster. I read the whole thing, up to the words The End. Pieces that were missing had fallen back into place. And I was very aware of the fact that we were going back to the place where we first started. It felt like I’d be seeing it again with new eyes. Maybe more would come back to me. I desperately hoped I’d feel different than I did last time I was in Newark. I had driven there to escape from James. It felt more like I was going home now.

I'd also been nervous about waiting to meet Dr. Hughes. Then watching him poke and prod my son. And the talk that James wanted to have had never left the back of my mind.

I looked down at Liam in my arms. I didn’t want to let him go. I didn’t want to go back to the apartment with James and hear whatever he had to say. Because it was bad. I knew it was bad or he would have just told me here.

“The cardiologist is arriving in the morning as well,” James said. “Let’s go get some rest.”

He lifted Liam out of my arms without me waiting to respond. He leaned down and whispered something in his ear. Liam squirmed in his grip and it almost looked like he smiled. James gently kissed his forehead.

I watched the scene with a smile of my own on my face. I was sorry that I wasn’t there for Liam for the first few weeks of his life. But James had it covered. He had showered him with love. Liam hadn’t been alone. I watched James gently place Liam into his incubator. The nurs

e attached all the tubes back to him and gave us a wave goodnight.

“I think he handled the transport pretty well, right? He doesn’t seem to be any worse. I know you were worried that it wouldn’t be good for him.”

“He’s strong. I was more worried about getting your hopes up.” James pulled me into his side as we walked out of the NICU. “But this was a good idea. My hopes are up too. It’s been a while since I’ve felt this hopeful, actually.”

“That’s good.” I looked up at him as we exited the hospital. It seemed like he was telling the truth. He looked happy and relaxed. So what did we need to talk about?