Page 22 of North (The Moral Compass 2)

North: Kara, I love you, and I know you love me, so let’s just try and talk about whatever has you spooked. Xxx.

North: Kara, please talk to me. You will leave me no other choice than to come and find you. Xxx.

North: Okay. Sorry, that’s too much. Sherie said you need time. How much time, Kara? I need you here with me. I love you. Xxx.

And then, I read the last message.

North: Just spoke with Sutton. I understand.

I read it again and again and again. Shit, it’s different. No kisses on the end, no I love you, no begging. Fucking bastard.

He’s just cut me free.

Chapter 17

North

Thelasttwodayshave been the worst of my entire life. West goes from wanting to kill me to wanting to make sure I’m okay. Sutton is destroyed. She just cries and cries and keeps asking me what the hell I’ve done. West eyes me because he knows I’m not telling the whole truth when I say I did nothing. Technically, I didn’t do anything, and that’s where the problem lies.

When Holly sent that letter, I didn’t ask Kara how she felt about the stuff that was said. I just told her what I thought she wanted to hear; I told her how I felt, not how I see her. Holly’s words obviously stuck deep inside her. I am also ninety percent sure she overheard South having his fucking tantrum. Those are the only things I can think of to make her react like this.

She told Sutton she doesn’t fit in, but she does. She fits with me perfectly. We are the perfect combination. Even in bed, we fit together like the yin-yang symbol.

It feels like I’ve texted and called her a thousand times. Not quite but close.She’s told Sutton that she’ll call me in a few days. I feel like Sutton was holding something back, though. And though it is going to kill me not to hold her, speak to her, or even fucking text her, I need to give her some space. So, I fire off one more text in the hope that she doesn’t feel any more pressure and knows that I’m doing what she’s asked.

North: Just spoke with Sutton. I understand.

I go for a swim, but it reminds me of Kara. I go for a run, but it does the same. I can’t shake her out of my head. Then, the jealous bunny arrives with his presents.

Sherie is a party animal. She will be dragging Kara out and getting into all sorts of shit. Look what happened last time. Stop fucking thinking, North. I need to find a distraction that will stop my mind from wandering.

I run back into the house to find West pacing up and down.

“Fuck man, what’s wrong?” I puff.

“You need to fucking ask?” He snarls.

“Well, yeah, I do. You look like you’re going to rip my fucking head off,” I bite back. I’m not in the fucking mood for this shit. Kara could be getting fucking laid by a French dick right now, and I’m standing here with my brooding brother.

“What. Did. You. Do? I just want to fucking know. What happened when you went away? Sutton is so stressed out, I am really fucking worried about her and the babies, North. I need to sort this out before she goes into premature fucking labour or, worse, loses the babies altogether,” he rants and starts pacing again. I know what I have to do. This isn’t fair to anyone.

“Look, it’s not my fault. Sit the fuck down, and I’ll tell you everything. But for God’s sake, you better promise not to shoot the messenger.” I look at West, worried. Out of my two brothers, West is the one you don’t piss off. He could snap your neck before you’ve seen his hands move. He nods and takes a seat at the island in the kitchen.

“Where’s Sutton?” I ask. I need to make sure she doesn’t hear any of this.

“Out with Mum. Why? What’s this got to do with Sutton?” He squints at me like I’m under interrogation. I sit down opposite and far enough away that I can run if he lashes out, and I begin.

He already knows about the letter Holly left in the room, but I recap anyway to make sure he gets the full picture. Then, I move on to Monday evening and South’s declaration of loathing for Mark, Sutton, and Kara.

The island fucking shakes as he smashes his hands down on the granite. I knew telling him would have this reaction, but he needs to know this was not my fault. I should have punched South right in his toxic mouth instead of walking out and losing everything I’ve ever loved, but I can’t go back and change that now. I can only try to make it right.

A minute or so later I hear his screams down the phone to South who is either stunned or just not fucking listening. You can never tell. He tells him what he’s done and how the whole family is falling apart because of him. The last thing I hear shakes me to my fucking core.

“You’re dead to me, do you hear me? Fucking dead! You don’t deserve a family if this is how you treat them. You need to make this right or never speak to me again, ever.” And the phone flies across the room and bounces off one of the patio doors with a crack like thunder. Then, he’s gone, up over the hill at the back of the garden. I go to the lounge and put on the screens. I can see him running up to the tree area at the top. It’s where he goes when he needs time out, but when he punches a tree and then falls to the ground, I run out after him. He’s on the grass, holding his arm and cursing every word known to man.

“Come on, let’s go get a drink. I’ll work it out with Kara. It’ll take time, but I’ll get her back. But I need to know if you’re going to tell Sutton?” I’ve got my arm around him, and I’m closer than I really want to be when he’s in this rage state, but his hand is fucked, so I think I’m fairly safe.

“Let this be a lesson to you, North. Don’t ever keep anything from the one you love. Even if you know it will hurt them. Make sure you phrase it so they don’t feel the pain. But lying by omission is still lying, North. Don’t do it, man. Just don’t do it.” He’s calmed down and more like my brother again. “And keep South the fuck away from me.” I just nod.

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