Page 67 of Hellfire

My fingers bit harder into her waist. “Fuck, I know, babe. I just can’t shake the lingering feeling that won’t leave my chest whenever I think about it.”

Her heart gave an audible kick within her ribcage. “It all seems surreal to me, especially after being drugged. I lost an entire day. It’s literally gone, and the entire thing is like one big, awful dream.”

“I wish it was,” I muttered against the material of her tank, then set my chin between her cleavage and stared up at her. “Thank you for not giving up, Hells.”

“Never,” she whispered.

I kissed her sternum where it was hidden beneath her tank and rose to my feet. At full height, I towered over my little hellion. One thing I learned about Hallie many years ago when she first transferred into our Special Reaction Team was that, while small in stature, she was a force to be reckoned with. She quickly earned respect from the guys and commanded it with a simple chin lift whenever she stood up for herself. While those solid foundations had been rocked over the recent weeks, I knew in my heart that Hallie would soon rise again from the ashes. Like a Phoenix: breathtaking and seemingly immortal. I just had to wait for those burning embers in her soul to catch a lick of life, and I would be there to worship her when she rose on reborn wings.

Until then, I took her under my arm, handed her a pair of my own socks, then playfully slapped her ass when she bent to pull them on.

Today was day one of my girl rising.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Hallie

“I hate you right now,” I growled. I was sore, tired, and sick to death of my body not responding like it usually did.

I’d held myself together for a week and a half ever since returning to Fort Irwin with Avery. I’d worked my ass off over the last ten days; risen at dawn, worked out, ate well, kept my head straight, and focused on shedding all the bullshit. I’d forced myself to be my normal self as much as possible, but this morning I’d rolled out of bed in a super shitty mood—one that even running six miles couldn’t shake.

Each vented verbal frustration directed at Avery was received with a breathless chuckle, which fueled my savagery. We were nearing the end of our daily six-mile run and today was by far the hardest mentally.

“Use it to push yourself, Hellcat.”

I kicked up a gear. My breath punched in and out of my lungs and the sharp early morning air made them sting. Avery easily matched my increased pace. It created a kick of competitiveness that spurred me to run faster, harder, well past the point of my legs turning numb.

By the time we came to the end of the trail and slowed to a jog, I was biting back tears and shaking with pent-up emotion needing to be released.

I set my hands on my waist, facing away from Avery so he didn’t see me on the verge of breaking. The overload bubbled and pushed higher into my throat, emerging as ragged hiccups. Despite trying my hardest to lock it all down, the torment escaped. Wave after wave lashed and coiled higher until I couldn’t hide my distress from Avery any longer.

“Hells?” came his concerned voice. His hand touched down on my heaving shoulder. “Hallie?”

“Don’t.” I shrugged free. The caring gesture further weakened the walls I was desperately trying to keep assembled.

“Let it out, babe.”

My eyes cut to him as anger vibrated through my body. “Don’t tell me what to do.”

“I’m not. I’m trying to help.”

“Well, it’s not fucking working.”

“Okay, how about we—”

The last straw snapped. “No! No, no, no, fuckingno!”I gripped my braids and tugged so hard my head snapped back.“Fuck!”I screamed to the cloudy morning sky. “You son of a bitch,” I yelled at the top of my lungs to no one in particular.

I cursed and shouted, spilling out all the suppressed inner turmoil, unable to control the outburst now that it spewed free.

As the words dissipated and faded to an end, shattered sobs claimed the free space. They snagged in my throat before tumbling free. Each one painful and humiliating.

Avery mercifully gave me the space I needed to spiral, but hovered close enough to make his radiating presence known. Only once I’d set my hands on my knees and bent forward to catch my breath did he approach.

“Can I touch you yet?” he asked in a hushed tone.

I shook my head. “Not yet.” This was by far the hardest I’d shattered since my return from Cape Town and as good as it felt to have those emotions purged, it embarrassed the fuck out of me.

“You can leave, Ayve. I’ll find my own way back.”

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