Page 117 of Light the Fire

Shaking my head at the enigma that was the frustrating, dangerously handsome man in front of me, I began filling pots with water and put them on the stove to boil, turning on every burner.

I’d bathed since we arrived at this cabin, but only with cold water, and a chill had settled into my bones, so I intended to draw myself a warm bath, even if it took me an hour to fill it with enough water.

I ignored Zane as I went about my business.

Jorik and Rix joined us, taking up spots on the couch with the sewing needles and patching the holes in the sail. None of us paid Zane much mind until we’d all been in the house for roughly twenty-five minutes and Jorik broke the silence.

“Would you stop pacing!” he growled, glaring at Zane. “It’s not going to do any fucking good.”

I placed a new pot of water on the stove while removing a boiling one and walking to the bathroom to dump it into the tub.

“You have no fucking clue what’s going to happen,” Zane said. “None.” His eyes were wild as he spun around to pin his gaze on his brothers.

“And you can’t seem to get it through your thick fucking skull that what’s coming is inevitable. It happens either here or on the boat. What makes you think on the boat will make it any better?” Rix shook his head and rolled his eyes as I passed him on my way back to the sink.

Zane was vibrating. But I could see the understanding taking shape in his expression. Rix and Jorik were right.

The withdrawals they’d been fearing were going to happen no matter where we were. We would not make it to the meeting point at the end of the strait in the next day and a half. And even then, what was to say that who we were supposed to meet would even be there or have spare serum?

“Can I not just offer you some of my blood?” I asked, focusing my eyes on Zane, since he seemed to know more of what they were up against than the other two. “Just to tide you over?”

Zane scoffed, shook his head, and turned away. I’m pretty sure he muttered, “Stupid bitch.” In fact, my enhanced hearing made me damn sure of it, but I let that insult slide. His heart was racing, and the fear on his face was real and practically tangible. Which lent him a modicum of my sympathy and compassion. “No, we can’t justtakesome of your blood.”

“Why not?” I shrugged. “I’m right here. I’m your source. It’s my blood that you’re going to be going through withdrawals from. Can’t I just … top you up?”

Zane’s eyes were maniacal when he lifted his head and pinned his gaze back on me. “You don’t fucking get it. Blood straight from the source, not distilled, not modified in a lab—only maybe an hour. Then we’d start coming down from our high and just want more. You want to dose us, all three of us, every fucking hour for weeks?”

Oh!

I chewed on the inside of my lip, feeling rather foolish suddenly.

Zane’s laugh was humorless and mean. “Didn’t think so.” His nostrils flared, and his top lip curled up. “You are a drug, Haina. More addictive than crack, meth, cocaine, alcohol, and anything else to have ever been sold on the street in the last two hundred years. Why do you think super soldiers keep returning to their compounds? Why do you think they do what they’re told? Become slaves for the government? Because the government—our commanders—hold all of our power. We return because they promise us our next fix. We are ruled by our addiction. We live for the next dose. Those of us who have experienced detox would rather live a life of servitude than go through that again. And when the high is as good as it fucking is, well … there’s not much we won’t do for the next fix.”

I swallowed just as icy dread snaked its way down my spine.

Rix and Jorik had paused their sewing, and now all three of them were staring at me with a wild hunger in their eyes.

It thrilled me as much as it terrified me.

“We will become animals,” Zane said. “Feral. Rabid creatures. We will not see you as a person, as Haina.” He glanced at Rix. “As Wildcat.” He turned to Jorik. “As Angel.” Then his eyes landed back on me. “As Kitten. We will only smell the blood in your veins and want to take it from you by any means necessary to feed our craving, to stanch the burning pain in our bodies as our muscles and organs scream for mercy. For another fix. Just like when we first take a dose, everything inside of us will feel like it’s been set on fire. Only unlike when we take a hit, there will be no dissipation, no blooming pleasurable warmth. The burning will only get stronger. More intense. More painful. Our screams of agony and terror will haunt you. Our eyes will feel like balls of fire, and we will want to scratch them out of our skulls. We will want to cut open our abdomens to release the flames that we believe are scorching our insides.” His throat moved on what I could tell was a painful swallow. His eyes held such remorse that I found myself across the room with arms around his waist before I even knew I’d moved.

Surprisingly, he didn’t pull away from me.

I looked up into his stormy gray eyes, which were haunted by memories. His bottom lip trembled ever so slightly. “You need to get as far away from us as possible, Haina.” Cupping my jaw, he slid his thumb across my cheek. “Or we will kill you.”

I sucked in a breath.

“Dude,” Rix whispered. “You never told us.”

Zane’s gaze held mine for a moment longer before he flicked it to Rix. “I know. I’d hoped you’d never have to experience it for yourselves and I could spare you the details.”

Jorik cleared his throat. “We’ve got another day and a half?”

Zane nodded. “Two, tops. I might have a bit longer since you gave me a full dose. But maybe not, since so much of my enhancement went toward healing the gunshot and infection.” He pivoted his eyes back down to me.

“Where do I go?” I asked, the quaver in my voice setting the rest of my body into a tremble. All of our heart rates were going wild, and I could smell the fear rolling off Zane in waves.

He shook his head. “I don’t know. Maybe us being here is better than on the boat. I just … I just thought we had more time.”

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