Page 62 of The I Do Over

Now he did look at her but he wasn’t sure what to say.

“Because, um…the girls said that’s what you told Daniel and Xander.”

He was seriously going to strangle those guys when he saw them on Monday.

“Maddie, we’ve talked about this.” Sort of. “I do believe we would still be married if your parents hadn’t interfered. There’s no reason to think otherwise. I said what I said to the guys months ago, but now that we’re here like this again, it just sort of proves me right. We’re still compatible. That hasn’t changed.”

Her expression was serious—almost fierce for a moment—before going completely neutral.

“What are you thinking?” he asked. “Right now, what are you thinking?”

She sighed and turned to stare up at the ceiling. “I know we’re obviously still compatible…here,” she began slowly. “Physically, that hasn’t changed. And we can still talk for hours.”

“Right…” He didn’t see any of that as being bad and couldn’t understand why she sounded so guarded about it.

“But…”

Dammit. There truly was always a but.

Now she looked back at him, her expression a little sad. “Is there more?” she asked quietly. “It’s one thing to be in a purely physical relationship and some people are friends with benefits. We were in love once. We were best friends who were in love and enjoyed a physical relationship. I don’t know which of those we are, Knox.”

It was crazy how quickly he was able to say, “We’re still in love, Maddie. I don’t think that ever went away.” Rolling onto his side, he reached out and caressed her cheek. “I was mad at you for a long time. I can’t deny that. But I never forgot you and there were times I still felt like you were a part of my life—like I felt like I wanted to pick up the phone and tell you what was going on and then…”

“Then you remembered you were mad at me,” she said sadly.

All he could do was nod.

She mimicked his pose as she rolled onto her side. “That’s why I wrote so much in the beginning. There were so many things I wanted to say to you because, well…there was just so muchtosay. I missed talking to you almost as much as I missed seeing you. And when I graduated college, I remember wanting to share that with you and looking out at the crowd and wondering if you were there.”

“I was probably deployed somewhere at that point.”

Nodding, she whispered, “I know. It was a crazy thought, but…I used to tell myself that you were out there to make myself feel better. I just missed you so much.” Her eyes filled with tears and Knox immediately pulled her in close.

“I missed you too, Mads. I missed you too.”

“I wish you had gotten my letters,” she said quietly. “Even if you didn’t want to call or speak to me or get back together with me, I still wish you at least would have had the chance to read them. I would have written to you through all your deployments so you wouldn’t have been alone.”

He rested his head on top of hers. “That would have been nice.”

It wasn’t something he talked about but, hewaslonely for a lot of years in the service. He had plenty of friends, but…he still felt alone. Maybe it was by choice because he was struggling with the direction of his life, but if Maddie had written to him, it would have eased some of his loneliness.

Even if their relationship was only platonic at that point.

“Knox?”

“Hmm?”

“I do still love you,” she said softly, and he pulled back to look down at her. “Always.”

“Me too. Always.” Slowly, he rolled her onto her back and kissed her softly—almost reverently. And this time when he made love to her, he felt more of a connection, more emotion. He took his time and just watched her in wonder that she was really here—back in his bed and back in his life.

It was everything he ever wanted.

Later that night, when they were on the verge of falling asleep, she asked him a bizarre question.

“So, um…what are your thoughts on frosting?”

“What?”

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