Page 68 of Fade (Fighting Fate)

I wanted to show him I was reliable, but I couldn’t argue. I needed this. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself knowing I’d chosen work over time with Daniel once he was deployed.

His deployment was a contract for six months. I knew six months wasn’t so bad. We’d gone through that when he was in Australia. Even the no contact thing. But this was different. I knew it. He knew it. Everyone knew it. He wasn’t just going to be in a different country. He was going to be in a country in trouble. A country known for being filled with extremists who enjoyed murdering people who opposed their beliefs.

I wasn’t stupid. I knew Daniel thought I was fairly oblivious to exactly what he was trained to do, but when he’d told me, I researched it as much as I could. I needed to know what he would be doing, and how much danger he’d be putting himself in.

The dictionary listed the meaning of reconnaissance as, a search made for useful military information in the field, especially by examining the ground. But I knew when it came to war-torn countries and terrorism, recon meant so much more than that, and close-range recon even more again.

They needed to find out where the worst of the bad people were stationed. They needed to find out where they kept their weapons. They needed to find out information relating to the enemy’s plans and when they were going to attack. They needed to get close, and they needed to put themselves in danger to do it. It made me feel sick.

Now, with only a little more than twenty-four hours before D day, I lay snuggled in Daniel’s arms, listening to his deep, even breaths. It wasn’t often I woke before him, and even rarer he would keep sleeping once I woke. But for some reason, it meant a lot for me to be able to do it. Feeling him breathing under my hand calmed me. It settled the nausea that constantly lingered in my stomach these last few days.

Emotions were a hard thing to balance. On one side, Daniel needed to know how much I was going to miss him while he was gone. He needed to know that his absence was going to affect me deeply because that showed him how much I loved him, but too much would cause him to feel guilty, and I didn’t want to do that to him. He was already in the Marines when we met. I knew that going into our relationship, so I had no right to make him feel guilty about leaving.

I sighed. I knew I wasn’t doing a very good job of attaining balance. The constant sick feeling always seemed to show on my face. I knew he saw it.

Glancing up, I was surprised to find his eyes open, watching me with a wary gaze.

“Good morning, Princess. What’s with the frown so early?”

I lightened my expression and rolled so I was lying half on top of him. “I was sulking because you weren’t awake to play with me.”

Daniel’s lips curled up with a smirk. “You want to play?”

Pushing myself up, I slid my leg over his body until I was straddling him, my center rubbing over his erection, and my hands on the pillow either side of his head. Daniel groaned and grabbed hold of my hips. Teasingly, I lowered myself down until I softly grazed my lower lip over his.

Feeling my wetness spreading over his cock, I tilted my hips forward, ready to sink down on him. A knock on the door froze me.

“Daniel?” Susan called out.

Daniel groaned and gave me an apologetic look. “Yeah, Mom?”

“There’s a Captain Miller here to see you?”

All playfulness immediately left Daniel’s face. “Shit.” On that note, I scrambled off him, clutching the sheet to my chest as he sat up. “I’ll be right down.”

I heard Susan murmur ‘okay’ before Daniel leaned forward and gave me a soft, slow kiss. Pausing, he breathed me in before giving me another little kiss and climbing from the bed.

Silently, I watched him dress and then open the door, glancing back at me before he closed it again. “I’ll be right back. Don’t move.”

Nausea rolled through my stomach. Shit. I seriously needed to get this under control. I couldn’t believe I was worrying myself to the point of being sick. I couldn’t just sit here, though. It was making it worse. I wanted to know what the captain was here for.

Swinging my legs from the bed, I quickly threw on a pair of panties and a sundress, roughly running my hands through my hair so I at least didn’t look like something the cat dragged in overnight.

With my hand on the doorknob, I paused, gauging my stomach, wondering if I should try to throw up while Daniel was busy. I hadn’t eaten much over the course of the last day, so I didn’t think I’d have much to bring up if I tried.

Swallowing, I took a few deep breaths and willed my stomach to behave, and then I went downstairs.

Daniel was just saying goodbye when I reached the bottom of the stairs. In his hand was a yellow document folder.

Captain Miller’s gaze swung to meet mine, and he tipped his hat. “Ma’am.”

A weak smile was all I could manage under the circumstances. He must have understood, though, because he simply nodded to Daniel and turned on his heels to walk down the front path.

I stayed where I was, one foot still on the bottom step, as Daniel closed the door behind him.

When he turned to look at me, he gave me an inquisitive smile. “I thought I told you to stay where you were? I believe we still need to finish what you started.”

I tried to smile, but even I could tell it was pathetic. “Can we go for a walk?” I asked.

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