Page 101 of Sweet as Sin (Bad Habit 1)
I closed my eyes and bit my lip to try to stifle my soft moan as his fingers delved gently inside me, then pulled out and stroked upward to my clit, spreading my wetness around as he swirled his fingers. This time I was unsuccessful at stifling my moan. I let it out on a long, low breath, arching into his hand. His soft, pleased chuckle followed.
“Yeah. I’m right.”
Still holding my wrists, he directed, “Up.” The pillow nudged my hip. I lifted my hips and he slid the pillow under my stomach so my ass was propped in the air.
He moved, and between my legs I felt his erection, stiff and ready. His hands tightened around my wrists. “You’re gonna take me hard, Kat. You’re gonna take whatever I wanna give you.”
God, his voice alone made me even wetter. Commanding. Demanding. Hot.
“You’re gonna do that to make up for sayin’ somethin’ without thinkin’ that twisted my heart and made me want to break every piece of furniture in this house. And tellin’ me not to get mad about it. And then laughin’, no less.”
I’d hurt him. With my stupid words, and my stupid giggle, I’d hurt him. Knowing that, my chest squeezed tight.
His voice darker, Nico said, “Say ‘yes’ now, Kat.”
I whispered, “Yes.”
He thrust inside me. I cried out. His free hand curved around my hip, steadying me. “Say you’re sorry, baby.” He thrust again, harder than the first time, the force of it slamming the headboard against the wall.
I felt every glorious inch of him, all the way in and out. “Nico, sweetie—”
Crack!
Shocked, furious, incredibly turned on, I groaned.
The other cheek now had a matching handprint to its twin.
He did it again and again as he fucked me from behind, varying the intensity and the location of the blows, so that I didn’t know what to expect, and couldn’t anticipate what was coming. I’d never liked it before, when other guys thought it would be cute to try and spank me. On the few occasions it had happened—most notably with lingerie man—it had been awkward, and not at all sexy. Somehow it had seemed distasteful, as if I was giving someone permission to hurt me, which felt weird, and wrong.
This didn’t feel weird. This didn’t feel wrong.
This felt empowering.
I was submitting to this of my own free will, to a man I knew loved and cherished me, and would never harm me. This was a way for him to communicate his displeasure with something I had done. A physical way, because he was a physical man. He showed his feelings with his body and his actions, with the intensity in his eyes.
It was also a way for me to make it up to him.
It was raw, definitely. But it was also honest.
Nico didn’t sulk, or punish me with silence or withholding his affection, or try to make me jealous by flirting with another woman. He wasn’t passive-aggressive. He was completely up-front with his emotions, with what he felt and wanted, from the very beginning.
He was all in. He had been from the start. It had always been me who was holding back, second-guessing, waiting for something bad to happen because I couldn’t believe my good luck.
That sunk in, hard. Chloe had been right. The entire time I’d been with Nico, I’d held my breath. Held on to the not-so-fantastic past. Held on to the certainty that I didn’t deserve to be this happy.
I’d been robbing us both.
I turned my face to the sheets, stifling a sob.
Nico immediately stilled. He leaned over me, planting a fist into the mattress near my head. He panted, “Baby?”
Pain made my voice thick. “I’m s-sorry, Nico. That was so s-stupid of me.”
That’s as far as I got. Nico pulled the pillow out from under me, withdrew long enough to flip me over and settle between my thighs, then pushed inside me again, his fingers tight against my head.
“Yeah, baby,” he said softly, staring into my eyes. “But it’s not the end of the world. It’s over now.”
He flexed his hips, sinking deeper inside me. I turned my head away and closed my eyes, trying not to let him see me cry.
