Page 19 of Claimed By the Bookstore Alpha
"Of what?"
"Of this being real." She squeezed my hand. "Some people run when things get serious."
"But why? We were good together." I kept to myself the bit about falling for him and never wanting to be with anyone else.
“He might need more time to figure it out."
I wanted to believe her, but his words were so final. “Some things are just incompatible.”
Another round of nausea hit me and I barely made it to the bathroom before I was retching. When it passed, I slumped against the cool tile wall.
I made a decision. I was going to talk to Flynn and demand an explanation so I could figure out what was really going on. I couldn't keep living in limbo.
When I arrived at the shop, he was closing up. From a distance he appeared tired. He tensed when I approached.
"What are you doing here, Clark?”
"I need to talk to you, not whatever that was the other day."
His hands stilled on the lock. "I told you, I don't think that's a good idea."
"Well, I do. I'm going crazy here. One day we're..." I didn’t want to talk about sex so I waved my arms around. “And the next you're treating me like a stranger. What changed?"
"Nothing.” His voice didn’t give anything away. “We want different things."
Anger flared inside me. Who was he to tell me what I wanted? "What do I want since you seem to know better than I do?"
He flinched. "You want something simple and someone who can give you what you need.”
Didn’t everyone want their needs met? This was getting us nowhere.
"I can't be that person.” The certainty in his voice had me blinking away tears. "You can't understand."
"Then help me!"
"I can't." He dropped his keys, making me jump. "Just... please. Let it go."
"No. I'm not going to pretend that what we have doesn't matter." I wasn’t giving up until I got an explanation.
"Of course it meant something." His control was slipping. He looked so sad and his expression matched my own. "That's the problem. Because you don't know what you're signing up for!" His voice rose, then dropped to a whisper. "You don't know what I am and if you find out, you’ll look at me in disgust."
"I know exactly what you are. You're kind and intelligent and you love books more than anything else in the world. You're careful with people because you don't want to get hurt, and you think you're not good enough when you're actually amazing."
Flynn stared at me and his eyes glazed over. He mumbled about something that happened when he was a kid. I wanted to find out more but he batted the words away with his hand. “You’d never understand and you should go.”
The dismissal hurt as if I’d been slapped. "Fine. If that's what you want."
"It's not.” He was so quiet I almost didn't hear him.
He had me twisted in knots but I had to get out of the store and breathe in fresh air. I had to forget him and get on with my life. I’d fallen for this man despite his walls and his fears but I didn't know him at all.
My vision blurred and the nausea flared as I headed out. Behind me, he said my name, but I didn't turn back. I'd fought for us. But I couldn't fight Flynn's demons for him. I spent the night alternating between crying and throwing up, my body as miserable as my heart.
Whatever he was hiding, I was done trying to solve the puzzle. Some people weren't ready to be loved.
NINE
FLYNN
