Page 181 of Dawn of Chaos and Fury
“Brecken,” Theon said softly, seeing where Luka was going with this. “We need to deal with Brecken.”
“Tristyn said he would take care of it,” she answered, trying to pull her hand from Luka’s.
“And we’re going to take care ofyou,” Theon replied. “You have to deal with this, Tessa. You can’t ignore the grief and the pain. When you do, you lose control.”
Luka dropped her hand to go turn on the shower, while Theon stepped forward and reached for the hem of her shirt, lifting it over her head.
“It’s okay to feel things,” he said softly. “You need to feel them.”
“And you?”
“You know I feel things,” he said with a dark grin, reaching to tuck her hair behind her ear. “From the very beginning. It’s you we’ve never been able to read and figure out. Not even you know how to do that.”
“Let’s go, baby girl,” Luka called, and they both turned to find him waiting.
Naked.
Her cheeks flushed as she hooked her thumbs in her pants and pushed them down. Theon followed suit, and they both moved to the shower. She reached for Luka, pushing onto her toes, but he stopped her before she went any farther.
“Just so we’re managing expectations,” Luka said, “there will be no fucking.”
Tessa lurched back, crashing into Theon’s bare chest, and he almost let a huff of laughter slip.
“What do you mean?” Tessa demanded.
“I mean exactly what I said,” Luka continued calmly, but Theon knew he was anything but calm. She was naked, all that bare flesh on full display. Of course, theywantedto fuck her, but he also knew what Luka was doing.
Luka reached for her once more, and Theon nudged her forward. Guiding her under the water, Luka moved behind her, tipping her head back. “You need to deal with this, Tessa. Not by drinking. Not by fucking. Not by drowning in vices that push it down. Like Theon said, that’s when your power takes control.”
Then he was passing her back to Theon, where he waited with shampoo. He began lathering her hair, and even still, hecould feel the tension rolling off her. “We know he was a friend, little storm.”
“Stop,” she gritted out.
“We won’t stop,” Luka said simply. “You need to learn to process your emotions, baby girl.”
“Don’tbaby girlme,” she snarled. She rounded on Theon, eyes hard. “And what about you?” she snapped. “You’re pushing down emotions. I can feel you too, you know.”
He knew his smirk was dark, and she faltered for the briefest of moments before steeling herself once more. Passing her back to Luka, he said, “Don’t worry, Tessa. Ourfeelingsabout this matter will be dealt with when it’s time. But right now, our focus is on you, not us.”
She swallowed thickly as Luka guided her head back again, rinsing the shampoo from her hair. No one said anything else as they conditioned her hair and washed the blood from her skin. But they felt her. Felt her trying to shove down her sadness. Felt her starting to spiral. Felt her doing everything she could not to feel at all. Despite the heat from the shower, she was trembling when Theon held her to him while Luka quickly washed up. Then Luka did the same for him before stepping out and drying off.
It wasn’t until Theon guided her out to Luka, waiting for her with a towel, that Luka said, “I’m sorry you lost someone else important to you.”
“Don’t,” she snarled, sparks crackling at her fingertips.
“I know we just learned of his true loyalty, but he did a lot for you. For Kat. Likely for so many innocent people we will never know.”
“Luka, stop,” she said again, her sharpness cracking.
“I wish we’d gotten the chance to know him more. He seemed like a decent male. Arrogant and questionable, but decent in the end.”
“Luka!”
He moved her to the side so Theon could step out, and he quickly dried himself off while Luka kept talking.
“I’m sorry you had to see his death, but it’s not your fault,” Luka continued.
“Of course it’s my fault,” she snapped. “His death is directly correlated to my actions. Just like Auryon and Pen. You and Roan nearly faced the same because of me.”
