Page 86 of Wanting More
Sapphiresatontherim of the tub and rubbed the oil down her legs. Smooth and freshly shaven, the oil glided on easily, leaving an almost golden shimmer. For the hundredth time, she stopped and listened for any sounds from downstairs.
Were they up now? Were they downstairs waiting for her?
Last night she thought she would never fall asleep. Parts of herself fighting to stay up and wait for them, and the other logically telling her she should do what Hayden said and get some sleep so she could see them in the morning. See them both.
Her stomach knotted with nervous energy at that.
Today she would see them both. Confront them at the same time about last night. Rubbing some oil on her arms, Sapphire bit her lip. What if they changed their mind? Or what if the rules that Hayden spoke of weren't what she had envisioned?
Doubt compounded with fear, and she sat there in her underwear as thoughts of dread played out imagined scenarios in her mind. Them taking turns with her. Designated days with each man. A rift eventually dividing their friendship from the strain and unspoken insecurities.
Snapping the top back on the bottle, she stood up and walked to the mirror. Seeing her worried reflection. Sapphire frowned.
"It's not going to be like that," she grumbled, staring back at herself wearing only a simple pink bra and matching panties.
Besides, there was no evidence to support her spiraling thoughts. Actually, there was evidence to the contrary, she thought with a smile. Swiping her phone off the sink counter, she scrolled through her text from last night with the two of them. Too wired from both of their touches, she had sat in bed thinking about them. Like now, her thoughts last night had turned from pragmatic to worst-case scenario. Before she could talk herself out of it, she had texted them.
Me: You know I've never had sex with guys like you before, right?
Me: I mean, obviously you don't. What I'm saying is, besides never being with more than one guy is that I've never had guys like YOU.
Hayden: How do you mean?
It had taken her a minute to try and formulate the right words for her reply, but Hayden, as impatient as ever, had sent her the frustration emoji that just seemed so perfect for him. The air being blown out of its nose and closed eyes of annoyance reminded her of Hayden's stern face.
Me: Likerealmen. Looking back on it, even though they were older than me, my past boyfriends were just boys. They weren't as experienced as you two.
After that reply, Hayden's icon simply registered as read.
Joel: Are you having second thoughts?
Me: No no no!! That's not what I'm saying. I'm just saying…just being with one of you will be overwhelming, so two of you would just be…a lot. And some of my boyfriends always seemed to think of me as super experienced when we first got together for whatever reason.
Hayden: Stop referring to them as your boyfriends. They aren’t. We are.
Even now, she couldn't help the frisson of pleasure at his possessiveness. As juvenile as it may be to call men like them her boyfriends, the confirmation of whatever it was they had going felt glorious. It made her breathe easier knowing he thought of her belonging to him.
Joel: Yeah. It really makes me want to punch something every time you say that. Good to know it wasn't just me. Besides, I know you aren't some femme fatale.
Me: Thanks for the vote of confidence.
Joel: LOL I mean we know you pretty well, and we know you're just sexy as hell but just a normal girl under that mean face.
Me: I AM NOT MEAN, and I don't have a mean face, dammit!
Hayden: You are pretty mean. But I like that.
Joel: I do too. It's hot as fuck. But I hear what you're saying and you don’t have to worry.
Hayden: We will take it slow.
Looking at her last text, Sapphire felt the heat creep back up to her face. She could hardly believe she had the nerve to text it.
Me: Okay…but I'm not saying I don’t want to do…everything.
Their text didn't arrive until a full minute later and Sapphire had nearly had a heart attack waiting for it.
Joel: Fuck me. I have no words. None.
