Page 54 of Brew
“Because she’s dead.”
Olive’s smile drops. “Oh, I’m sorry, Brew.”
I palm the back of my neck, feeling like an asshole. “Goin’ out,” I say to no one in particular. “Don’t know when I’ll be back.”
“Brew?” Erica says behind me, but I ignore her.
When I get to my motorcycle. I hear footsteps behind me. “Fuck off,” I say, thinking it’s Haze. When I turn, Erica is there, her stride faltering. “Shit, I thought you were Haze.”
“Brew, she didn’t know.”
“So what? She’s allowed to learn ASL if she wants. Has nothin’ to do with me.”
“You just… you seem upset.”
“I’m not upset. I was taken off guard.”
“I know this girl really meant something to you.”
“You don’t know shit,” I say. “Aside from what the girls at the club probably told you.”
“I didn’t want you to think I’d told Olive anything. She has a kid in her class who’s deaf, and she wanted to try to converse with him,” Erica explains.
“You don’t need to give me a rundown, like I said, the kid is allowed to learn sign language, it’s not illegal.”
She palms my bicep, and I glance down at her hand. “Don’t leave like this.”
I narrow my eyes. “Like what?”
“Angry.”
“Who said I’m angry?” I move into her touch, relishing in it. “You know what I’m really angry about?”
She shakes her head. “Tell me.”
“That we don’t get to finish off what we started. That you have doubts about me because of who I am and what I do. And that I enjoy makin’ bad people suffer, it’s in my blood. Deep down you know that about me, and you hate yourself for it.” The words just tumble out. “But I’m also not here as an experiment for you to get back on the horse. I’m not gonna have a taste of you and then never touch you again. Better off walkin’ away.”
Her lips part, no sound coming out, but I know she heard me. “You have your reasons for why you do what you do.” Her voice is eerily calm. I’m not sure I like it. “You’re not an experiment, I would never think that. I didn’t… I didn’t know you felt this strongly?—”
My eyes snap up. “Because I’m an asshole? I don’t feel things like any normal person?” My anger is getting the better of me. “Valencia didn’t deserve what happened to her, and it’s my mission to make sure the people who were involved suffer. That makes me a liability. One you don’t want in your life.”
“I’ll be the judge of that.”
“You don’t know what you’re sayin’.”
“Because you haven’t even given me a chance,” she blurts. “I’ve never had a man…touchme the way you did. Gently. Kindly. You wanted to make sureIwas okay, not the other way around. I was scared. Maybe I did retreat, but at least I’m being honest about it.”
I snort. “Right. You say that now, but when I’m covered in the blood of the men who killed her, you might change your tune.”
She swallows hard, straightening her back. “No. I won’t.”
I pique a brow. My little Sparky might just have a fire raging inside her, as well.
“So come to me.” I softly brush my hand against her cheek with my knuckles. “Don’t make me wait, because this? This islike fuckin’ torture. Think about it, and if you walk away now, we’ll forget about everythin’.”
“Brew…”
“Don’t worry about your job, it’s safe no matter what you decide.Youare safe with me.Oliveis safe. Never forget that.”
