Page 49 of Pregnant in Plaid
"Exciting. Terrifying. All of it at once." She smiles. "But you'll do great."
"I don't feel ready."
"Nobody does," Sarah says. "I had three kids and didn't feel ready for any of them. You just figure it out as you go."
"That's what Tessa keeps saying."
"Because it's true," Tessa says. "Look, I moved to Alaska on a whim for a guy I barely knew. Literally left my entire life behind. If I can do that, you can handle this."
"That's different."
"How?"
"You chose it. I just... endedup here."
"Didn't you, though?" Marnie tilts her head. "You bought a plane ticket. You came. That was a choice."
She's not wrong.
"I came because I had to," I argue weakly.
"You came because you wanted to tell him," Tessa corrects gently. "You could've stayed in Florida. Could've figured it out alone. But you didn't."
The room goes quiet.
"I don't know what I'm doing," I admit.
"Join the club." Emma raises her glass. "To not knowing what we're doing but doing it anyway."
Everyone drinks to that.
The conversation moves on. Decorations at Moosehead Lodge. The small ceremony. The ridiculous amount of flannel everyone's going to be wearing.
It's sweet and simple and everything Tessa wanted.
"What about you?" Emma asks me. "You ever think about weddings?"
"Not really. I've been focused on survival."
"But if you did?" she presses.
I think about it. "Small, I guess. Just people who matter. Nothing fancy."
"Sounds like a Trace kind of wedding," Marnie says innocently.
I throw a pillow at her.
An hour passes. Emma pulls out some ridiculous game involving embarrassing Tessa with stories about her and Gage. I slip outside onto the porch while everyone's distracted.
The cold hits immediately, but it feels good. Clears my head.
The door opens behind me.
"You okay?" Tessa wraps a blanket around my shoulders.
"Yeah. Just needed air."
"You've been quiet tonight."
