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Vanessa cupped Emma’s face in both hands. “You’ll figure it out. You’ll know exactly what to say and when to say it. And as for her earning any right to be your sister, you tell her she’llnever have to earn a thing from you and that she’s had you from the moment you knew she existed.”
Emma searched her wife’s eyes, praying she could take on some of the calm Vanessa possessed. “What if I mess it up? What if she goes through life never believing me?”
“Youwon’tmess it up,” Vanessa said with a smile. “And shewillbelieve you, because you’re going to show her. Not just with words, but in the way you turn up for her every single time you can.”
“God, she said she’s never felt cool. That’s probably because she thinks nobody loves her.” Emma’s bottom lip quivered again, but she refused to allow her emotions to consume her any longer. If she was going to fight for this relationship, she had to keep her head. “I swear if Ievercross paths with that pathetic excuse of a human being, I’ll punch her fucking lights out.”
“She’s not worth it.” Vanessa kissed Emma’s forehead. “You are allowed to feel heartbroken for Freya. But don’t let it stop you from seeing what’s in front of you. She’s here, she’s asking questions she has the right to ask, and she wants to know you. That, in my book, is still a win.”
Emma swallowed. “I wish I could hug her right now.”
“One day you will. One day, you’ll forget there was ever a time when she wasn’t in your life. We’rebothgoing to make sure of that.”
Emma closed her eyes and curled herself against Vanessa. The ache in her chest was still there, but beneath it was something far stronger. Something that made her want to fight for every single step forward with Freya.
Because now, she knewexactlywhat she was fighting for.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Emma closedthe door to the P.E. office and leaned back against it, the cool wood grounding her for a moment before her mind went into overdrive. With a deep breath, she crossed the room and lowered her water bottle beside the stack of unmarked worksheets she’d been avoiding all morning. She didn’t know how she’d made it through the day without falling apart—Freya’s email sat heavily in her mind from last night—but here she was…still somehow in one piece.
She pulled her phone from her hoodie pocket and scrolled to Nia’s number. It was the end of the school day, and she needed answers before her mind tied itself in any more knots. She’d already avoided Freya today, unsure how to respond to her email, and she couldn’t go another day doing the same thing. Freya would take her silence to mean something it didn’t if she kept this up.
Nia picked up on the third ring. “Hi, Emma. How are you doing?”
Emma exhaled as she dragged a hand through her hair. “I’m alright. I got Freya’s email last night.”
“I’m glad to hear she replied,” Nia said warmly. “How did it feel reading it?”
“Honestly? Like someone had ripped my heart out and danced all over it.” Emma’s throat tightened. “I don’t know how much you’re aware of, but I found out via her email that she’s spent most of her life believing I left home because I hated her.”
“That’s difficult to hear,” Nia acknowledged. “But you have to remember that this is exactly why we give young people the chance to ask questions. They deserve the truth from the people involved,notthe version they’ve been told.”
Emma lowered herself into her chair and pressed her palm to her forehead. “She’s asking for answers. I just don’t want to mess up how I give them. That’s why I’ve called. Before I reply to her, I want to know how much or how little I can give.”
“You’re allowed to answer her. If you’re comfortable, respond in whatever way feels most genuine to you. Be honest but keep it age-appropriate. She’s testing the waters. This is her way of seeing if she can trust you.”
Emma nodded slowly. “I can do that. I just want to make sure I get it right. I don’t want her to ever feel like I’m brushing her off. I fear the longer I go without responding, the more likely she is to feel as though I’m avoiding her.”
“From what I know about you, I don’t think you’re capable of brushing her off. You’ve done everything right so far, and now that there’s an opening, you’re worried about putting a foot wrong. I can assure you, Freya wants to know the truth. Who better to give her it than you, her sister?”
Emma sank back in her seat with relief. “Thanks for putting my mind at rest. I guess I’m just terrified that saying the wrong thing will result in Carmen refusing me any time with her.”
“Carmen is…doing better with it all.”
That knowledge surprised Emma. The last two times they’d met, it had felt as though Carmen was capable of killing her with one glance. To know she was potentially coming around to the idea of Emma being in Freya’s life meant Emma didn’t feel soscared moving forward. “There’s something else, too. I wanted to ask if it’s appropriate for me to reach out to Carmen. I was hoping I could sit down with her and discuss the next steps, maybe…future plans. If Freya’s feeling up to it at some point, I’d like to take her out for dinner. Just something simple, so we can talk without it being about school or netball.”
“That’s a great idea,” Nia said after a brief pause. “And yes, you canabsolutelyapproach Carmen. Politely, of course. She’s Freya’s primary carer, so everything will go through her. I’d recommend telling her exactly what you’ve just told me. That you want to take things at Freya’s pace, and you’re not expecting anything before she’s ready.”
“That’s the plan. Slow and no pressure.”
“Good. I’ll make a note in the case file that you’re open to more contact and that you’ll be speaking with Carmen about it. Her number is in the documents I gave to you during the meeting. I dropped you an email with all the relevant information included, too. Carmen also has your number should she need it.”
Before this call, Emma couldn’t have imagined Carmen ever needing her number. But now, she felt another glimmer of hope. She let out a deep breath and relaxed her shoulders. “Thank you, Nia. Really.”
“That’s what I’m here for,” Nia said. “And Emma? The fact that Freya wrote such an honest email isn’t a bad sign. It means she wants to understand you. She wouldn’t bother asking if she didn’t care.”
“I know. I think the shock of finding all of this out will eventually settle down at some point. But right now, I still can’t believe I have a sister.”
