Page 46 of Show Me How to Heal
“I’ve got a little something for you,” I told Zayne as I turned back around.
“What?” Zayne’s eyes widened as I pulled the box out of my bag. I felt stupid for doing this.
Hell… it was probably the most unromantic present ever.
But he’d told me his feet hurt after long days of being up all the time, so…
“Here.” I handed it over before grabbing my crutches. “I hope you like it.”
I gave him a kiss goodbye and got the hell out of there before he got the chance to open the present. I couldn’t take it back, but I didn’t have to see him actually open it.
I didn’t know what would be worse right this moment — if he hated it and was disappointed, because I’d put a lot of thought into it, or if he loved it, because I wasn’t sure I could handle him being grateful right now.
So I ran away. Well, I hobbled away on my crutches as fast as I could, out the back door, through the side alley, toward my truck parked in front of the shop.
As I got into the driver’s seat, I saw Zayne back out front, sitting on my stool at the cash register, my present on the counter still wrapped in that hideous wrapping paper I’d had to wrap it in because I hadn’t found anything else, and I hadn’t wanted to use newspaper. In retrospect, the newspaper would probably have been better.
Starting the engine, I left the parking spot right as Zayne started opening the present.
I wanted to watch him but didn’t want to see his reaction, so in the end, I just drove off, leaving him and all my good mood behind.
As I stood in front of my door wrestling with my keys, I felt a pang knowing I’d be greeted by darkness and silence. Maybe even cold. Right in this moment, standing on my front porch, I seriously contemplated turning around and heading back to town to meet up with Zayne and his friends after all.
Fuck.
My mind was a mess.
I pushed the door open, almost expecting a little bell to ring as had been the case in Zayne’s shop, but there was only silence, the only sound coming from the forest behind me, the wind rustling through the leaves.
Kicking off my shoes, I headed straight towards the living room, turning on the lights, throwing myself onto the couch, and letting out a deep sigh.
I reached for my phone in my jeans pocket, pulled it out, and immediately called my brother. The phone rang only two times before he answered.
“Everything all right?” Moritz asked, sounding a little tinny.
Upon hearing his voice, I let out a sigh, relaxing slightly against the cushions.
“Yes, no, I don’t know. Pick one because I can’t.”
“Uh-oh… trouble in paradise?”
I let out a humorless laugh. “I have no idea what’s going on. Everything’s a mess.”
I could hear rustling in the background, a static noise, more rustling, and footsteps, then Moritz’s voice was back, sounding a lot clearer. “Today was your first official day at work, right? The soft opening?”
“Yeah.” I nodded, though he couldn’t see me. I pulled my legs up and rested my head on my knees. My bad knee started throbbing almost immediately, but I didn’t care. “It went really well. Zayne’s out celebrating.”
“Oh… Let me guess; your crush didn’t invite you and now you’re moping.”
“I was invited,” I told him, closing my eyes. “I declined the offer.”
“Why?” Moritz’s voice had an edge to it.
“Because I don’t know what I’m doing anymore,” I said, swallowing around a lump forming in my throat. I grabbed one of the fluffy, forest green throw blankets, covering my legs as cold seeped through me. It had nothing to do with the temperature in here; the thermostat would keep the temperature even until I’d figured out how to use my fireplace. There was wood outside — not like the woods, but actual firewood. I doubted I could just walk into the forest even though it was my property, fell a tree, and throw it right into the oven. I knew it needed to dry or some shit like that.
Damn, and I probably needed someone to take care of the forest. AFörster… Forester? Ranger? I had to look it up sometime.
“Lukas, you’re spacing out on me again.”
