Page 52 of Boss On Notice
“Well, I think Orion and I can head up the Labor Day Gala together. He has a powerful contacts list and so do I.” Grinning, Heather winks at me. “We’re good together.”
“Well, I concur,” my mother says, rubbing her palms together happily.
It’s as if I’m having an out-of-body experience. I can’t let this farce to continue, but I’ve always allowed it and played my role well. Lila also said that love is like blood. I’ve come to the conclusion that my mother’s love has been too much like blood. It’s time to cut the feeding tube and create a different dynamic, a healthier one.
My cell phone, which is in my pants pocket, buzzes just as I’m about to address the exchange that has taken place between Heather and my mother. My phone performed jumpy buzzing instead of a smooth consistent buzzing, and that alerts me that the caller is part of my close contact list.
“Hello,” I say, after sliding my cell phone out of my pocket.
“Oh, come on,” Heather grouses.
“That’s not good manners,” Marigold adds.
“Hey, O, guess who’s at my party?”
I’m on my feet and striding out of the dining room. “Mina—I forgot about your party.”
“Thanks a lot. But Lilly hasn’t forgot about my party though.”
I stop in the middle of the hallway and turn to face a mirror that’s attached to the wall. “Delilah?” I ask.
* * *
I arriveat Mina’s place. I almost didn’t go back into the dining room. I could’ve walked out without facing the wrath of Heather and my mother. But avoidance meant I wasn’t ready to deal with the issue of my mother head-on. I went back into the kitchen and excused myself.
“What?” Heather gasped. “You can’t leave. Who does that?”
Looking at the seconds tick by on my watch, I said, “Being that I thought I was coming over here to look over documents for my mother and got roped into a dinner I didn’t plan for, I figure I can leave. Good night, Heather.”
Heather leaped to her feet. “Well, I’m going with you.”
“You’re not invited.” I kiss my mother on the forehead. “We’ll have a discussion later,” I said to her.
“Are you sure you can’t stay? The cook made your favorite,” Marigold said.
I took a moment to acknowledge the look on my mother’s face. Right then and there I realized that it was me who was hanging on. My mother had no real stake in whether I came or went. She merely loves and likes my company. Heather has been taking advantage of that fact.
“I can’t stay, Mother.” I kissed her on top of the head. I froze, suddenly experiencing déjà vu. But the person I kissed this way wasn’t my mother. It was Delilah. I want her. I fucking want her. And I’d better get to Mina’s party quickly. The last thing Mina revealed to me was that Delilah had gotten chummy with Lynx Grove. There’s no way I’m going to another Grove wedding where somebody I love, truly love, is getting married to someone else.
I headed down the hallway with Heather screaming after me, “Wait, Orion! You can’t leave without me!”
She wrapped me up from behind and held me. I thought,This woman’s fucking crazy. I should’ve ended it with her a long time ago.When I made Lila break dates last winter, I had decided to work on my relationships with women. The wake-up calls for me were Herc capturing me on video getting a blow job by someone he was being forced to marry. The other punch in the gut that made me question the way I dealt with women was Treasure choosing Achilles. I thought for sure she would choose me first or eventually choose me later.
On February 14, Valentine’s Day, I had run into Treasure at Mother’s town house. It was the first time since she’d been with Achilles that we were able to talk alone. And so I asked her, “Why not me? Why him?”
“Because I love him,” she had said.
“But not at first,” I quickly countered.
“That’s easy,” she said, making sure I couldn’t look away from her eyes. “You are incapable of love. I mean really, Orion, do you love me? Unconditionally, and want to spend the rest of your life with me?”
I immediately considered her question and became spooked as one person came to mind. Someone I couldn’t shake. The reason why I called Delilah on the weekends, bothered her to no end, was because I always wanted more of her.
“No,” I had said. “I can’t see myself with you forever.”
“I know,” she had said and then strolled back down the hallway to help my mother choose Lake Clark artwork for the new townhome.
There was no need to confess that she was right about me being unable to truly love one woman. Being someone’s all in all, or other half, and then relying on her to be the same for me scared the hell out of me. But Delilah has been my other half for four and a half years. However, I’ve been shit to her. I want to turn that around. That’s what I was thinking when Heather tightened her grip on me and whimpered, “Please don’t go.”
