Page 18 of Ocean's Lost Octopus
We were going to do just fine.
Chapter Fifteen
Ocean
Daddy and I were having lunch when the call came in. His brother got hurt on tour. Instantly, I went into problem-solving mode, trying to figure out how to get him there as quickly as possible. I really jumped the gun on that, because by the time he got off the phone, a plan was already in place, and he didn’t need me.
It was funny how so much of the time I relied on Daddy to help me, but the second he needed me—or at least I thought he did, I jumped into action without a single second’s hesitation. That said a lot about our relationship and how far it had come already.
The injury wasn’t awful like I’d first assumed when I started to look up flights for us to go and help him, but it prevented him from performing. And I suppose given music was his dream, that was just as bad. He’d hurt his arm and wasn’t going to be working while he recovered. Coming back home made sense.
At the time, I didn’t think a whole lot about what that would look like or would mean other than that I was going to get to meet him and hopefully he’d like me and think I was good enough for his brother.
But then after talking with Daddy, I discovered he was out of a place to live. I assumed his brother would let him stay in the spare room if he wanted to, and he probably would, but Duncan saw this as a time for him to leave, and he went on the hunt for another apartment. I didn’t know why, but it really hurt knowing that he was looking for someplace else. We were still fairly new, and we hadn’t talked about where we would see our relationship in the next month or year, as far as living situations or commitment levels. But I still took it so personally.
It had been a couple of days now, and he’d toured a few apartments. He’d asked me to come with him, but I declined, citing work. Sure, I had work, but I could have just taken the time off. It wasn’t like I didn’t have a ton of time banked. I just feared that if I went with him, I’d nitpick everything and make his task so much more difficult than it needed to be. That or I’d cry. Probably both.
So, tonight, I was in my little room, hugging a bunch of stuffies, including Tennie and my orca, and hating that I wasn’t brave enough just to tell Duncan what I wanted. Normally, nothing kept me from oversharing with Daddy, but with this came such a possibility of rejection, and that terrified me.
My phone buzzed a few times. I ignored it, focusing on my stuffies, until there was a knock at my door. This wasn’t the kind of building that allowed people to go from door to door, selling their politics or some random internet package, which meant the only person it could be was Duncan. I mean, sure, a neighbor could show up, but that hadn’t happened in all my time here, so Duncan it was. I got up, still holding on to Tennie, and let him in.
“Hey, I wasn’t expecting you.”
“I called a few times.”
Had I realized it was him, I’d have picked up. “I’ve been ignoring my phone.”
“What were you doing?” He looked worried more than angry, and that had my guilt lying heavy.
“Hugging my stuffies.”
He grabbed my hand and led me straight to the couch, where he sat down and then pulled me into his lap. “I need you to talk to me, sweet boy. Don’t say everything’s fine. Don’t say there’s nothing to worry about. Tell me what has you so down these past few days.”
“You...” I buried my head in the spot where his neck met his shoulder. “I don’t know.”
“You do know, Ocean, but I don’t, so please share with me.”
That was the encouragement I needed. “I don’t like that you’re looking for apartments.”
“I know being away from here is going to be hard, but I don’t want to impose on my brother anymore. It’s gonna be hard for him to adjust to being back and injured as it is. He’s already struggling knowing that he had to drop out of his commitment all because he got hurt.”
Put like that, it all made sense. The moving part, anyway.
“That’s not what I mean, Daddy. I mean, no, I don’t want you moving far away. But also, I have this whole huge place. Why didn’t you ask to move in here?” It took a lot to get it out there, but now that I did, relief poured through me.
He hugged me…so tight, so comforting, so warm. “Because I can’t afford it.” His confession was all but a whisper. “I don’t even make enough for my brother’s apartment. It was a sublease, so I paid part of the rent, which was already low because it was stabilized. A place like this…it would take all my salary.”
“I wasn’t asking you to pay half or anything. It’s already paid for.”
“But I need to contribute. I wouldn’t feel right. What kind of a daddy mooches off his sugar little?”
“I wouldn’t call me a ‘sugar little.’ You can help with utilities and groceries and such. And it’s not like I wouldn’t have to pay for all this whether you were here or not, and I want you to be here.” I grabbed his hand and held it tightly. “And before you start telling me you don’t contribute or you won’t contribute enough, think about all the ways you take care of me. If that’s not a contribution, I don’t know what is.”
“I don’t know…” I hated hearing Daddy like this and hated even more it was because of what I’d said.
“Tell me this, Duncan…if every single place in the state were the same price, where would you live?”
“With you.”
