Page 21 of Waste Some Time
“Through the new year?”
“Yeah. Maybe longer than the week,” she said. Then she took a deep breath and said the thing she hadn’t told anyone. “I’m thinking about moving back here.”
“Oh.”
Katie sounded surprised, and Sydney couldn’t tell if it was a hopeful surprise or an oh-no-now-I-have-to-see-you-again surprise.
“I’m not settled on the decision yet. I’ve been thinking about it for a while. Today and the last few days being here reminded me of all the reasons I love this place. I’m running out of reasons to stay in San Diego.”
“Is this another thing you’re keeping from Stephen?” There wasn’t annoyance in her question. Only exasperation. “I just don’t know how many secrets I can keep track of. I’m not morally opposed to your plans or you having secrets or anything. It’s more that my brain isn’t real good at juggling too much. That’s kind of why I like having lists and planners and all of that stuff.”
“It won’t be a secret long. Not by the end of this week, at least.” Sydney sighed with the weight of her choice lessening slightly from telling one person. “I just haven’t decided yet, and like the other thing, I don’t want my family’s enthusiasm to influence my decision. I’ll tell them as soon as I know for sure.”
She was leaning more towards a decision with every passing minute.
“Yeah, Stephen’s great. But he does make his opinion known on matters. And, like with today, he tends to have a way of making what he wants happen.”
“Exactly. I just want to get straight in my head what I want to do before his voice is in the mix.”
Katie suddenly looked horrified. “Did that happen with your divorce? Stephen mentioned it, but none of the details.”
“No, not at all.” Sydney shook her head adamantly. “I was very careful to keep that between me and Doug until we were sure we were splitting for good. I had a couple of coworkers I’m close to back in San Diego that I confided in along the way, but I didn’t tell Stephen until it was a done deal.”
“I’m sure he loved being the last to know.”
“He wasn’t exactly the last to know, but yeah. He was surprised and hurt that I didn’t tell him earlier. Eventually, he got over it and was fully supportive.” Sydney warmed at how much he had supported her through her divorce. He even flew out for a weekend to help her move. “He’s a great brother, really. I just want to be certain before I tell him. I have to do this part on my own.”
Katie removed her hand from Sydney’s. “I’m sorry. I don’t want to do that either. But I’m glad you told me.”
There was no hint of fear in that. No hesitation.
Sydney fought the urge to ask how Katie might feel about her moving back.
No.
Katie’s opinion wasn’t a factor either.
Especially since neither one of them wanted to take this further. Sydney couldn’t jump into something serious, and Katie was clear she didn’t want anything but a committed relationship.
“I’d be a horrible best friend if I didn’t point out the fact that your brother has a great shoulder to cry on, and he’ll be supportive of any decision you make.” Katie gave a compassionate smile. “And about the other stuff, too.”
Sydney looked away from that smile before she made the terrible mistake of moving toward those lips.
“I know,” she said. “But I didn’t need to cry on anyone.”
“So the divorce wasn’t tough?”
There was a weird edge to Katie’s voice. Sydney couldn’t quite figure out what that meant. She also couldn’t forget that earlier comment about not kissing like an accountant. She’d been trying not to think about kissing Katie all day, but that one line kept coming back and dragging the memories up with it.
“No, not really.” Sydney pulled her coat tighter against a cutting gust of wind. “But to be clear, I’m bisexual. I know I haven’t told Stephen, but this was something I’d already figured out, and that didn’t have anything to do with the divorce. I loved Doug. We just weren’t right.”
Katie put her hands up. “You don’t owe me an explanation.”
“I know. But I want to be up front on that.”
She didn’t know why exactly, but it was important to her that Katie knew all of this. She wanted everything between them to be clear, even though this wasn’t the start of anything. At the very least, she’d probably see Katie again from time to time when she came home. Or maybe even more often than that if she moved back.
Either way, she wanted Katie to know everything.
