Page 38 of Waste Some Time
“I know that.” When Rachel frowned and raised her brow, Katie said, “I do. I get it now. But this isn’t about the checkboxes. I need someone who is ready for a relationship. And isn’t my best friend’s sister.”
Rachel scoffed. “You can’t be serious with that.”
“Not that exactly. I just… I like them. All of them. If this doesn’t work out, I don’t want to lose them. And I wouldn’t want to make Sydney uncomfortable. Ever. So it wouldn’t even be a choice. They’re her family, so I’d have to be the one to walk away.”
“Why do either of you have to lose anyone? Since when are you such a pessimist?”
“I’m being realistic.”
“Katie,” Rachel said in a serious tone. “You are the most optimistic person I know. What has happened to you this week?”
“Nothing. Sydney was clear that she wants time. That she wants to settle into her new life here and explore options. So I’m backing off.”
Rachel frowned and narrowed her gaze, puzzling her cousin out. Katie was used to it. They were always trying to read each other's minds ever since they were kids. Usually, it worked.
A moment later, Rachel’s eyes widened. “You’re in love with her!”
“What? No.”
Was that true?
“I mean, I knew you liked her,” Rachel continued. “But I didn’t realize you’d fallen inlovewith her in a week.”
“I’m not in love with her,” Katie said, trying to convince herself and Rachel. “I just like her too much to push her into something she isn’t ready for.”
And she wasn’t interested in getting more hurt in the long run than she already was.
That was the truth of it.
“Liar,” Rachel said. “I know you, and you love her.”
Katie took a deep breath. “Fine. I love her. Doesn’t change anything.”
“This changes everything!” Rachel adjusted her position on the couch, shifting beneath Katie’s feet to lean closer, much to Benjamin’s disapproval at being jostled in Katie’s lap. “Now we know what we’re really working with.”
Katie laughed. “And what’s that?”
“Well, for starters, you can’t give up on this. If you love her, making this work is worth fighting for.”
“I’m not fightingher.” Katie shook her head. “She’s made it clear what she wants and what she doesn’t want. I’m not going to try to change her mind.”
“Does she still feel that way? Maybe she’s changed what she wants, too. Maybe you could have the start to the new year that you’ve wanted so much.”
Katie let herself enjoy that possibility. But only for a moment.
“That’s up to her,” Katie said. “She’d have to tell me that herself. Until then, I’m backing off. For both of us.”
Rachel frowned again but seemed to give in. “Fine. But I’m still rooting for you two.”
Silently, Katie agreed.
* * *
Katie beamedwith pride at the smaller otter standing on her hind legs clapping at the crowd as they clapped back at her. Rose had picked up this trick last week, and it turned out to be a perfect ending to her portion of the show.
Rose dove back into the pool while Mel waited on her rock for the next command. Katie gave her a wink, knowing Mel probably didn’t have any idea what that really meant. But Katie knew.
She was so proud of that otter. A week ago, she’d been hyping up the new year and telling Mel how great everything was going to be for both of them. But she’d given a lot of thought about that stance over the last twenty-four hours, and she’d come to a new truth.
