Page 35 of Caged in Desire
“Does that mean you'll be intimate with me?”
“Excuse me?”
“They said you have things written in your contract likeminimal touch, minimal eye contact, no kissing.Are you going to be like that with me?”
Thinking back to all the rules I had with my subs, I can’t imagine missing out on those things with my wife. I wish I could touch her all the time. I wish my obligations would allow me to always be with her. I certainly can’t imagine not being able tolook into her remarkable violet eyes. And her lips…I’ve dreamed of tasting those again since our wedding day.
“I don’t want to be. You’re special. It’s different with you.”
“You say I’m special, but they have a piece of you that you refuse to give to me,” she says, hanging her head.
Finally allowing me to touch her again, I hold her face in my hand, tilting it back up to match my gaze. “Katarina. Intimacy is just not something that comes easily to me.”
“So you’ll never kiss me?”
Lifting my other hand from where it rests on her thigh, I tuck a strand of fallen hair behind her ear before cupping her face. “Of course I will.”
Her voice is barely a whisper, and if I weren’t so close to her, I would miss it. “Then do it…please?”
I freeze. Why do I feel like a teenager kissing a girl for the first time? I suppose because this isn’t justanygirl. It’sthegirl. I didn’t even realize I had a “dream girl” until I met my wife, but she’s all I’ve dreamed of since before we even got married. She’s all I’ve dreamed of since I saw her picture.
“Ugh, will you at least fuck me then, so I can at least say I’ve had as much of myhusbandas his pastwhoreshave had?” Whatever calm she had is replaced by an attitude rivaling that of earlier.
I slowly trail my hands down her neck before resting them on her shoulders. “I’ve given you my last name. Why can’t you see how much more that means?”
Still straddling me, she shakes away from my hold. Apparently, she doesn’t want me to touch her, but sitting on my lap and teasing my already weeping cock isn’t a problem. “Exactly. I’m yourwife.Why won’t you fuck me?”
“Language, little girl.” Squeezing my eyes shut, I do my best not to raise my voice, but her temper is starting to wear on me. “Not a single woman has ever had what you have.”
“Well, they were pretty explicit about how yourcockfelt, and you’ve definitely not given methat!Am I supposed to spend the rest of my life celibate? To sit around, thankful that you grace me with your touch?”
Still frozen, I furrow my eyebrows as I try to understand what she’s feeling right now. Her emotions have been all over the place tonight, and I don’t want to overstep. I’m about to reach for her when she huffs, jumps off the bed, and marches out of my room, slamming the door as she leaves.
Chapter eighteen
“It’s hard to believe we used to be her size.” Henry’s sister, Margot, sighs and looks at me wistfully as I try on another dress in the third boutique we’ve been in today.
I was slightly intimidated when Margot reached out to ask if I’d like to go shopping after Thanksgiving with her and Henry’s sister-in-law, Sloane, but I shouldn’t have been. It crossed my mind briefly after our wedding that I should reach out and try to build those relationships, but things have felt so busy since moving in that I just haven’t had the chance. Between settling in, getting to know the staff, and working on my plans to seduce my husband, I’ve been a bit preoccupied.
Spending time with the whole Sinclair family during the holiday itself was a whirlwind, with lots of attention on Sloane and Ledger’s baby, Ledger Jr., so I wasn’t the main attraction. I was able to mostly avoid being in Henry’s proximity between the men watching football and the women cooing over the baby and discussing Blanche’s pickleball team.
Today, they immediately set my mind at ease, taking an interest in how things are going in my household withoutmaking me feel like they’re prying. I know Margot grew up in society, but even so, I don’t think her interest in me is from being trained how to make small talk. I think she actually cares. Sloane is a sweetheart, and we’ve trauma-bonded over our insular childhoods—although at least she was allowed out into the world.
I’ve laughed more than I have in a long time, but as Sloane echoes Margot’s sentiment with a sigh, I realize they might also be living vicariously through me today.
“Neither of us was everthatsmall, and you know it. But no, I can’t remember a time when I fit into every sample size in this store,” Sloane says wistfully, absentmindedly rubbing her belly.
Both women are pregnant, Margot with her first and second, and Sloane with her second. Even though Margot is having twins, Sloane is a little farther along and popped earlier with this pregnancy, so they’re roughly the same size for now. As soon as I suggested stopping at a maternity store, both of them cursed me and said they were counting on me to be their avatar for the day, so here I am. They have impeccable style, so I really can’t complain.
“I like it, but don’t you think it’s a little…”Much,I try to say before Margot interrupts.
“Howdoes every color work on you? Have you ever done a color analysis?”
Sloane rolls her eyes, but agrees. “Tell the salesperson we’ll definitely take this one. Then can we go eat lunch? Ledger keeps texting me that it’s been too long since I’ve eaten, and I hate agreeing with him, but I think he’s right. There’s a great Mediterranean place a few shops down, if that’s okay?”
I forgot that Ledger tracks Sloane’s every move, so of course, he knows we haven’t eaten yet.Must be nice having someone who’s that obsessed with you.Agreeing to stop for lunch, we send our purchases to the car with my driver and make our wayto the restaurant, ordering one of everything so we can graze. With a round of mocktails ordered along with our appetizers arriving, Margot gives me a solemn look.
“Kat. It’s been wonderful getting to spend time with you today. I think you’re a great match for my brother. You’re funny and lovely and smart and blah blah. But I’m going to be completely honest with you.”
