Page 42 of Tell Me Why
Christian watches me carefully as I spend the next fifteen minutes talking my brother out of starting an all-out war against the Burning Crown. And, honestly, by the time we hang up, I’m not one-hundred-percent sure I’ve been successful.
I toss the phone on the bed. “He’s satisfied. For now.”
“Is he going to be a problem?”
“Probably,” I reply. “You know, you two are more alike than you realize—impulsive, violent, blinded by revenge. If you guys could get past wanting to kill each other, you might actually be friends.”
“Blinded by revenge? We were minding our own goddamn business before you guys popped up.”
I step up to him. “First of all, there’s no ‘you guys.’ I’m notinShadow and Ash. I’ve told you that several times now. I’m here for my brother and only my brother. Second—setting the Tyler thing aside—do you really expect me to believe that you and the other Sacred Sons were just ‘minding your own business’ before Sin showed up? You guys have a hand in everything that happens on this campus. Hell, in the whole town.”
“There’s no order without violence,” he says simply, like that justifies everything.
“There’s no order withoutleadership,” I counter. “We’re not all living in the Game of Thrones, for fuck’s sake. Hurting people isn’t the only way to get shit done.”
Honestly, I don’t know why I’m even wasting my breath. This is the same argument I have with my brother, which always ends up falling on deaf ears. In my brother’s case, our family ties to the mafia have always reinforced the idea that violence is the only way to maintain control, so yeah, it was ingrained in him. And I don’t know, maybe it’s ingrained in Christian, too.
He smirks down at me, his large body too close to mine. When he lifts his hand and reaches for my face, I flinch. But he doesn’t grab my chin like usual. Instead, he brushes his knuckles down my cheek softly.
“I know it seems strange.” His eyes are fixed on his hand as he strokes my face. “But most people are fascinated by violence. They’re drawn to it. Turned on by it, even.”
Swallowing, I try to control my physical response to his touch, but my heart is already fluttering behind my ribs like a trapped bird. My palms are already sweating. And the fun part? I’m powerless to stop any of it.
“Not everyone,” I reply.
He clicks his tongue at me and shakes his head. “Professor Cannon would agree with me. There was a whole chapter on it last week—but of course you wouldn’t know that, because you dropped that class after our little encounter in the hallway…”
“I couldn’t risk you finding out who I was…” I say defensively.
He hooks his finger under my chin and tilts my face up, so I’m looking at him. “See, I don’t think that’s the real reason. It’s the lie you’ve been telling yourself. But you know what I think…?”
“I don’t give a fuck what you think…” I say quietly.
“Ithink it’s because you enjoyed the thrill, the uncertainty, and it scared you…” His finger leaves my chin and trails down my throat. “You pretend to be such a good girl—hiding in the shadows, only stepping into the light to protect your brother…But you and I come from similar worlds. We were born in blood, grew up surrounded by brutality...” He pushes the tip of his finger into my breastbone. “And I know there’s something in here thatcravesviolence—Just. Like. Me.”
I scoff at his statement. He’s so sure of himself, but he doesn’t know a damn thing about Shadow and Ash, or how I was brought up. Was there violence? Sure, but it was necessary and far removed from the savagery that Christian and the Sacred Sons revel in on a daily basis.
My teeth clamp down on the inside of my cheek. “You have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Sure.” He smirks. “You don’t think I recognize that flicker in your eyes when I’m rough? Huh, Eve? You don’t think I see that shameful secret you bury deep,deepinside?”
Part of me wants to retreat behind anger or dismissal, but something about the certainty in his eyes keeps me from denying his statement outright. And even if there were some small kernel of truth to what he’s saying—which there isn’t—there’s no way in hell I’d ever admit it to him.
I shake my head. “You don’t know me.”
One corner of his mouth lifts. “Oh, I don’t? Is that a challenge?”
“A challenge? No,” I say quickly realizing I’ve fucked up. Thelastthing I want to do is issue an outright challenge to Christian West. He’s the kind of guy who’d go to great lengths to prove his point, simply to avoid being wrong.
His hand slips down and covers my breast through the fabric of my shirt. My bra is still downstairs, on the floor of the study, so there’s only a thin layer of fabric separating his large hand from my bare skin. He squeezes, and the pinch of pain makes my jaw clench.
“So, what? You’re going to tell me violence doesn’t make your pussy wet?”
“It doesn’t.”
“Okay,” he says with a smile. “Let’s see if that’s true…” He brings his face in close, “...and remember, Ihateliars, Eve. So…if I catch you lying to me, I’ll have no choice but to punish you.”
CHAPTERSEVENTEEN
