Page 111 of Ink Me Three Times
No way.
I stand up straighter, trying to clear my head, but the dizziness only gets worse. My hands are shaking now, the thought running through my mind over and over again.
Oh no, am I…?
My breath catches in my throat as I push away from the wall, stumbling forward without even thinking. The words feel foreignin my mouth. They don’t belong to me. But they’re there now, taking over my thoughts.
What else could it be?
I stagger into the kitchen, my stomach still in knots, trying to keep it together. Jesse’s at the stove, flipping eggs. He doesn’t even look up when I walk in, but I know he feels me the second I step into the room.
There’s no way I’m eating anything. Not when my stomach is in knots, and I can barely keep my thoughts straight.
“Morning,” I say, my voice hoarse, barely above a whisper.
“Hey, you okay?” Jesse’s voice is gentle, but his eyes… his eyes are sharp. He sees right through my act, even if I try to hide it behind a mask. “You don’t look so hot.”
“I’m fine,” I say quickly, maybe too quickly. I force a smile, hoping it’s convincing. "Just tired. I think I might skip breakfast."
His brow furrows as he turns down the heat on the skillet. “You sure? I made your favorite. Scrambled eggs with salsa and avocado on the side. It’ll help.”
I try to nod, but my stomach clenches just at the thought of food.
"I'm good," I say, shaking my head. "I’m just, uh... I need to go run an errand."
Jesse gives me that look, the one he always does when he’s trying to decide if he should pry or not. I can feel his concern swirling in the air between us, but I don’t have the energy to explain.
"What’s going on?" he asks, his voice low but steady. "Are you sure you're okay?"
I can’t tell him. Not this. Not yet. I open my mouth, then close it, running a hand through my messy hair.
There’s a split-second hesitation, then the lie slips out. “I just need some... tampons.”
I try to say it casually, but it feels wrong on my tongue. He doesn’t seem convinced, but he lets it slide.
“Alright, you want to borrow the car?”
I nod gratefully. Thank goodness the mention of menstruation doesn’t leave room for questions. “Yeah, if you don’t need it?”
“I’m not working until this afternoon. I assume you’ll be back by then?”
“Sure will.”
I make my way out of the house, my footsteps feeling heavier with each step. The cool air greets me like a slap to the face as I step outside, but it’s not enough to shake the fog in my brain.
I slide into Jesse’s car, feeling like a complete stranger in the driver’s seat. The smell of his cologne still lingers in the upholstery, and it makes my chest tighten. I pull out of the driveway a little too fast, my hands gripping the wheel harder than necessary.
As I drive, I can’t seem to push the thoughts away. They’re too loud, too real. The dizziness comes and goes, making my vision blur for a second before it sharpens again. The road stretches ahead, and I tell myself it’s just exhaustion. It’s just too many late nights, too much stress.
But as I drive further from town, it gets harder to deny the gnawing, growing fear in my gut. I turn the music up, trying to drown out the storm of thoughts, but it doesn’t help. The steady hum of the engine is almost a countdown to whatever comes next.
Eventually, I hit the highway, and that’s when the tears start. Quiet at first, like they’re just waiting to escape. A small leak, a trickle down my cheek.
I wipe it away quickly, focusing on the road ahead, but it’s no use. They come faster now, hot and quick, they’re breaking out of me whether I want them to or not.
I want to turn around. I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to keep lying to my brother…
But he’d kill me if he knew.
