Page 57 of Sunshine
Fuck. That was so fucking pretty.
I want to know what your orgasm feels like on my fingers. I need to feel you come around my dick. I want to know what it tastes like when you fall off the edge. I’m going fucking crazy here.
Sorry, not sorry?
I’m about to say more when a notification appears at the top of my screen. It’s a message from Daisy, and a wave of guilt crashes over me. I jerk upright and open her text.
Daisy
Galentine’s Day is next Friday. You want to order in some food and hate-watchSleepless in Seattlewith me and Charlie?
I bow my head over the screen and squeeze my eyes shut, but I feel like the worst best friend in the world. I never want to hurt Daisy, so what am I doing? What the fuck am Idoing?
I heart Daisy’s messages, then return to Dylan’s thread, my fingers shaking for other reasons now.
Daisy just messaged me about Galentine’s Day. We’re having a girls’ night in.
The three dots fade in and out on my screen, and when a message doesn’t follow, I crack and send one more.
Should we stop?
I type out one more question but then delete it.Should we tell her?
Yes, and Daisy never forgives me. No, and Dylan as good as confirms that there’s nothing worth saving between us. Either answer will ruin me.
The dots in our chat fade in and out again, mirroring the pendulum of my emotions, before Dylan’s message flashes up on the screen.
Dylan
I don’t want to stop.
He wants me, and I hate myself a little for wanting him back.
Neither do I.
sixteen
Dylan
It’s Sunday morning, Lizis covering for me at the restaurant, and fifteen minutes before Poppy is due to arrive at the house, I surprise Izzy with a pair of new blue-and-purple hiking boots. I’d picked the brown ones first and made it all the way to the sales counter before Poppy’s voice sounded in my head, and I swapped them for something more fun.
“What are these for?” Izzy asks as she turns them over in her hands.
“You and I are going on a hike today.”
Her face lights up, and she bounces on her toes. “Really? Where? Why? When? Can I wear a tutu? What about my cowboy hat? Can my stuffies come too?”
I chuckle and try not to dwell on how bad I feel that we haven’t done this before. “Yes, really. There’s a trail not too far from here that your grandmother used to take me to when I was your age, so I thought we’d start there, and we’re going to leave in half an hour. As for why? Well, because it’s a nice day out and because I want to spend time with you, Little Bee. I haven’t heard nearlyenough about your first week at school, and I expect you to tell me all about it while we walk.”
Her soft cheeks flush with excitement. “What about the tutu and the hat? And my toys?”
“Hm.” I pretend to think. “You can wear a tutu over your jeans, as well as a sweater over your t-shirt. You can bring one stuffie—a small one—but I think a baseball cap will be better for hiking. Okay?”
“Okay, Daddy.”
I watch her race up the stairs, loving her so hard it’s a wonder my heart can hold it, then head to the kitchen to finish packing our picnic lunch.
Finn appears at the back door and strolls around the counter to help himself to one of the apples I’ve set aside for the hike. “What’s going on?” he asks.
