Page 30 of Sunshine
I weave to the right, and Daisy mirrors me again. “She’s never been married and doesn’t have kids, but she comes from a big family, so she wants at least three—two boys and a girl—preferably within the next five to seven years.”
My heart starts to race, my neck feels clammy, and I have no idea why I’m starting to panic. I used to be so fucking cocky. The king of confidence. Always in control. These days, I’m in control of nothing— not even my own love life.
“What the hell did you do, Daze?” I demand. “Put out an ad? Conduct interviews?”
Her cheeks flush pink as she holds my stare.
“You’ve got to be freaking joking.” I laugh because what else can I do? This is ridiculous.
“It wasn’t an ad exactly,” she argues. “It was an anonymous post in an online forum.”
Finn snorts, and at a hot glare from me, he turns his chuckle into a chesty cough. I tuck my hands under Daisy’s arms, lifting her petite frame off the floor so we’re eye to eye.
“Cancel it,” I say before setting her to the side and stepping around her.
“Dylan. Wait.” Daisy sets a hand on my arm, and the softness of her voice makes me pause. “Can you stop being so defensive for a second and hear me out? I’m worried about you, and I’m worried about Izzy.”
Izzy is the chink in my armor, and Daisy knows it, so I turn around with a sigh. “Why?”
“Don’t you want something more for yourself? A family? Don’t you want that for Izzy? What we’ve got here is wonderful—you know we all love that girl as if she were our own—but aunts and uncles can’t replace the role of a mother figure.”
“Izzy has a mother,” I reply, then wish I hadn’t.
Daisy’s hazel eyes flash. “Annalise doesn’t do enough. Not for Izzy and not for you. She’s the reason you haven’t dated all these years. You’re still hanging onto hope that she’ll come to her senses, move here permanently, and the three of you will be one happy family.”
“That’s…” I run a hand through my hair as my brain shuts down. “That’s not true.”Is it?
Daisy’s head drops to the side, her expression sympathetic, and Finn averts his eyes when I glance his way.
“I know Annalise isn’t going to choose Izzy over her career,” I say, but even I can hear my hesitancy. The ghost of old hope.
“She isn’t going to choose you either,” Daisy says gently.
I swallow thickly. “I know that too.”
“Maybe you know it here”—Daisy taps my temple, then places her palm over my heart—“but I’m not sure you believe it here.”
The possibility that I’ve subconsciously put my life on hold waiting for a future that won’t come true feels like the world shifting beneath my feet.
Daisy must see something of my thoughts on my face because her smile turns a little sad. “You don’t have to go out with Molly if you don’t want to, but I think it will be good for you. It doesn’t have to be anything serious. Just one drink. Just one hour. Just the first step in a new direction.”
Finn’s watching me with a neutral expression, but there’s something in the set of his mouth that tells me he’s got something he wants to say.
“Do you still agree with Daze?” I ask.
Finn hesitates, glancing at our little sister like he’d rather do anything than back her up, but then he nods. “You need to move on, bro.”
My brother and sister say nothing as they wait for me to make a decision, and all my thoughts about Izzy growing up and making better choices for her collide with the realization that somewhere in the past six years, I’ve put my own happiness on the back burner. I’ve given so much of myself to the ranch, to my family, to Annalise, and to Izzy. Maybe it’s time to make healthier choices for myself as well as my kid.
And perhaps dating will help me gain some perspective about what the hell is going on with Poppy. Chasing a girl because I’m physically attracted to her was fine when I was young and single with nothing to lose, but I’ve got to be smarter about this. For Izzy.
“Okay. I’ll do it.”
Finn gives me an approving nod as he pushes off the wall and disappears into the living room, leaving me with Daisy as she bounces on her toes, clapping her hands under her chin.
“Thank you, Dylan. You won’t regret it.”
“We’ll see,” I mutter. “So, what’s the plan?”
