Page 53 of Twisted Pact
“Why not? She married me to secure her family’s position. Used her beauty and charm to create alliances that benefited everyone involved. There’s no shame in understanding how this world works.”
“She also left you the second things got difficult. Walked away from her daughters when we needed her most. That’s the example you want me to follow?”
Papa flinches. Good. He should flinch when he brings up the woman who abandoned us.
“Your mother made her choices,” he concedes. “I’m asking you to make better ones.”
“Better meaning what? Sleeping with Alexei to keep him invested in protecting us?”
“I want you to recognize that your relationship with him has become essential to our survival. That what started as physical attraction has evolved into something that benefits everyone.”
I sink onto the edge of the bed. “You want me to keep sleeping with him and make him care enough to protect us.”
“Would you just be honest about what’s already happening? You care about him. He cares about you. Why not use that to everyone’s advantage?”
“Because it’s manipulative and dishonest.”
“It’s strategic,” he corrects. Papa walks to the chair by the window and sits, settling in for a longer conversation than I want to have. “Six months ago, you rejected Alexei’s proposal because you wanted to finish your education and escape this life. Do you remember what I told you then?”
“That I was selfish and naive.”
“I told you that choices have consequences. Refusing to do your duty would put this family at risk. I was right. Irina’s pregnancygave our enemies an opening. Your rejection of Alexei removed our best defense. The combination nearly destroyed us.”
“So, this is my fault?” I throw my hands in the air. “Everything that’s happened is because I wanted to finish my doctorate?”
“Your choices matter, Mila. You can’t separate yourself from this family, no matter how hard you try. And right now, the best choice you can make is to embrace what’s already developing between you and Alexei Kozlov.”
I stare at my father and wonder when he became this calculating. Maybe he’s always been this way, and I’ve just never noticed.
“What if he doesn’t want what you’re suggesting?” I ask. “What if he’s just protecting me because it serves his interests in this moment?”
“Make him want it. You’re smart and beautiful and capable of making any man fall in love with you if you choose to. Your mother taught you that much, at least.”
“Mama taught me that love is a transaction, that nothing is real, and that everyone uses everyone else.”
Papa stands and wags a finger in my direction. “I saw you at the wedding, Mila. The way you looked at him. The way you disappeared into the garden together was attraction.”
“So what if it was? That doesn’t mean I want to build my entire future around keeping a man interested.”
“No one’s asking you to build your future around anything. I’m asking you to consider that maybe what you want and what the family needs aren’t mutually exclusive.” He walks to the door. “Alexei risked everything to save your sister. He’s keeping yousafe when he could have walked away. Those aren’t the actions of a man who sees you as a transaction.”
I snort and reply, “They’re the actions of a man who wants something from me.”
“Perhaps, but wanting and caring are sometimes the same.”
He opens the door and pauses on the threshold. “Think about what I’ve said. And Mila? Try to eat something. You look terrible.”
He leaves before I can think of anything witty to shoot back at him.
I lie back on the bed and stare at the ceiling. My stomach rolls with another wave of nausea. My head throbs with the beginning of what promises to be a terrible headache.
Papa’s right: Alexei didn’t have to help Irina. He could have refused and let our family deal with the consequences of Irina’s choices. Instead, he put together a rescue operation that put him and his men in real danger.
Because I got on my knees and begged.
The memory makes shame burn through me. Not because of what I did, but because a part of me enjoyed it, and then he ruined it by comparing me to every other woman in this world. By treating what happened as if it were meaningless.
Except he apologized. He told me I was different. That he was wrong.
