Page 6 of My Sweetest Obsession
I understood it, had even embraced it at times.
It became familiar.
Just the new way life was going to be.
Yet what sucks me in now is something new.
An inky blackness so thick, so heavy it steals my vision, my breath, my soul.
Pure, impenetrable onyx.
I should be fighting it.
At least attempting to swim and struggle against the riptide of anguish that wants to consume me and drag me down to those inescapable depths.
But I don’t have it in me anymore.
I’ve fought too hard for too long to stay afloat.
Those obsidian waves that finally tugged Drew away from me can take me now, too.
As long as they bring me to him.
Because there is no light left.
No hope.
Nothing to keep me from embracing that which I’ve battled for months.
It was all a lie.
An obsession that led to this agony.
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The smell of coffee and harsh sunlight falling on my face jerk me awake.
A sledgehammer instantly pounds against my temples.
I release an agonized groan, rolling to the side of my bed, my stomach immediately roiling badly enough that I fight to swallow back bile that threatens to make me heave.
Fuck.
A heavy cloud of pain and regret envelops me, and I try to bury my head under my pillow to keep out the world longer so I don’t have to remember how I got into this state.
Because it’s bad.
Very bad.
I haven’t felt like this in so long that I forgot how awful it can really get.
Fuuuuuuuck…
My brain refuses to fire. It just flat-out declines to get on board with this whole waking up thing, but my gut continues to revolt, making me choke back its contents rather than have to leave bed to crawl to the bathroom and retch. Which I apparently did already at least once, given the taste in my dry mouth.
Something clangs across the loft in the direction of the kitchen, and I finally lift my head from beneath the pillow to attempt an investigation.
