Page 75 of Chess Not Checkers
One More Day
Jasmine Chamberlain
“You look different,” Dahlia comments softly.
We’re both standing beside the fire, just the two of us. Shepherd left a while ago to rest for the big game tomorrow. I should go soon too, but after such a good time, I’m dragging my feet. I realized tonight that when I’m surrounded by my family, it’s more difficult for the darkness to make a home inside my head. Their hugs and laughter make everything brighter somehow.
“I got a new curl cream?” I say, and she laughs, knocking her blanket-clad shoulder into mine. As it got later, the temperature dropped, causing us to wrap up in fleece blankets. Everyone else went inside some time ago, probably sensing we needed some sister time.
“You know that’s not what I meant. You look…lighter.”
I stay looking at the fire, not sure what to say. Is she upset that I’m happy even though we’re not together? Does she wish I could have been this way while living with her?
“Hey, don’t spiral on me. It’s good that you’re doing well. I was pointing out a good thing.”
I grip the blanket tighter. “You’re not upset that I’m happy when we don’t live together? I promise I’ve missed you, like, every day.”
Dahlia looks at me, concern in her eyes. “You can be happy and miss me. I can be happy and miss you. Two things can be true at the same time.” She turns to face me. “Where is this coming from?”
I face her, not sure I’m ready to dive into everything.
“I’ve been a little…anxious.” I whisper the last word. “I don’t know how I’m supposed to be. Should I text you every day so you know I miss you, or should I leave you alone so you can finally have a life without your baby sister third-wheeling?”
Dahlia shakes her head. “There’s no ‘supposed to.’ I’d love it if you messaged me every day, but if you’re busy with cheer or school or friends, then that’s okay too. And third-wheeling? Is that what you think you’ve been doing?”
I shrug.
Dahlia’s eyes fill with emotion. “Honey, that has never been a thought in my mind.”
My chin wobbles. I try to hold back my tears. I’ve cried way too much lately. I should really invest in those pocket tissues, or a handkerchief. “I know, because you’re amazing, but you deserve to have a life with Levi and however many adorable babies you want. I don’t want to intrude.”
A fierceness enters Dahlia’s expression. “Don’t you ever think you’re intruding. You’re my sister. I love you, and I’d be devastated if you stopped coming around because you were worried about intruding on my life.”
She opens up her arms, her blanket opening too. I bury myself in her embrace, tears falling in spite of my efforts to keep them at bay.
“I ate chocolate bonbons the other day,” I confess into her hair.
She pulls back and stares down at me with wide eyes. “By yourself?”
I shake my head. A blush tints my cheeks. “With a friend.”
She brushes my hair out of my face. “How did that go?”
I think of Shepherd’s arms around me. How safe I felt wrapped up in him. I recall his dimple in the candlelight and the way the caramel tasted when we kissed.
“Good.” I somehow manage to get the word out.
Dahlia raises her brows.
“And is thisfriendthe reason why you’re all sparkling smiles and floaty looks?”
“Partly,” I say with a smile. “But also, I really like college. My classes are great, and my roommates and I are getting close.”
“Sounds like exactly what we were hoping for.” Dahlia smiles, her eyes shining. “I’m so proud of you. I know these last years have been hard, but you’ve walked through them better than you think.”
“Thank you,” I whisper. “I couldn’t have done it without you.”
She gives me another hug. “And you won’t ever have to. I’m here to talk about anything. Includingfriends.”
