Page 95 of Blood & Snow
"Get up."
He pulls me to my feet, his grip firm but not rough.
"You need to get warm."
Every movement is difficult.
Just putting one foot in front of the other challenges me, but Xander must know what he's doing.
He guides me down the hall toward his bedroom.
My legs move without conscious thought, following his direction because I can't trust myself to make decisions.
The bathroom door opens, and he turns on the shower.
Steam begins to fill the space.
"Get in."
I stare at the water cascading down the glass walls.
"I can't?—"
"You can."
His hands find the hem of my sweater, pulling it over my head before I can protest.
"The shock will pass. Your body needs heat."
He strips away my clothes, no trace of desire in hismovements.
I stand naked and trembling as he tests the water temperature with his palm.
I'm so cold it hurts, and I'm stiff.
"Go," he orders with a push.
I step under the spray.
The heat hits my skin, but the shaking continues.
Water runs down my face, washing away tears.
I press my palms against the tile wall and let the shower beat against my head.
The courier's face won't leave my mind.
The way his mouth opened in surprise.
The way his hands reached for the wound as though he could push the blood back inside.
The way he crumpled.
I killed him too.
I stood there and watched and did nothing to stop it.
I am a murderer, just as heartless and evil as any other.
