Page 109 of Three Pucking Words
“I also know,” he adds, giving me a look I can’t quite decipher, “that you don’t want to let anybody down. You put people first without thinking twice about it. But what doyouwant, Bodhi? Because that’s what’s important here.”
I’d counter that Gemma’s happiness is a big part of the decision too. Honor told me how mad she was at her father for not being there for her when she was a child. The last thing I want to do is make my daughter question the level of love I have for her.
Scrubbing my hand down on my tired face, I blow out an exasperated breath. “I don’t know,” I admit, feeling defeated by the truth. “I’ve always thought this was it. I’d play until I physically couldn’t anymore. But then…”
He nods his head in acknowledgment. “But then you had Gemma,” he finishes for me. “I get it, brother. I would do anything for Beckham. If I were in your shoes, I’d take the job. I’m not you, though. We can make a pros and cons list or talk it out, but you’re going to have to be the one who ends up deciding what to do.”
I was afraid he’d say that.
Grabbing three mugs from the cupboard, I begin pouring the cocoa packets into it and then filling them with warm milk. “I know I can still play for another season. Maybe two. What I don’t know is what condition I’ll be in when they’re done. And that fucking scares me, man.”
I pass him one of the mugs after stirring the powder in.
“I get it,” he replies easily. “Have you talked to Honor about any of this?”
My lips twitch at the question. Sebastian and I haven’t discussed my dating life in a hot minute. Mostly because I tend to shut it down if it’s brought up. It isn’t because I don’t want people to know—I have no qualms with anyone knowing that I’m head over goddamn heels for the coach’s daughter. But I know Honor is a private person. And the lifestyle I live can be anything but that if I’m not careful.
The picture of us that went viral is proof enough. And while I monitored the comments and reposts and media inquiries to make sure that nobody said a bad thing about her, I know it’s only the beginning. If Honor chooses to be with me, to give me the chance I hope she does, there will be more moments like that. I refuse to let random people weigh in on my life.
“She doesn’t know,” I admit, staring down into my mug. “I’m going to see her tomorrow. I was hoping to weigh my options before bringing it up, but I don’t know if that’s possible without her opinion.”
“Because she matters to you,” he surmises.
“She does.”
He walks over and clasps my good shoulder. “It’s about time, Hoffman. I was starting to wonder if you were ever going to get past whatever thing you had for my sister.”
I gape at him in disbelief at his comment, which makes him laugh.
“What? Olive is great. She’s my sister, and I love her. I know your crush wasn’t the only thing holding you back from putting yourself out there, but it waspartof it. I don’t know what happened between the two of you, and I don’t want to. I’d rather not know the details for the sake of my sanity. But she went from being playful around you to cautious, like she thought you’dbreak. And don’t think I didn’t notice how stiff you’d get around her. You guys used to banter, and that stopped after she got with Alex. I’ve been waiting for you to move past that and find someone to make you laugh again. Someone to make you smile.”
I blink slowly. “You make me sound like I’ve been a miserable bastard.”
He grins. “Nah. But I can see when you’re actually happy and when you’re putting on a show. Honor makes your whole damn face light up. I imagine it’s the same way I get when I see Tori.”
Even the small mention of his wife and son makes his face brighten, and I can see what he means. “You should see her with Gem,” I say, shaking my head. “It’s like nothing I’ve seen. When I watch them play, it does something to me, man.”
“I don’t want to hear about your boner,” he cuts in with amusement and seriousness. Some of that melts away when he adds, “But it’s good to hear you have someone. Love looks good on you, Hoffman.”
Love.I’m not an idiot. It took me no time at all to realize that what I feel for Honor is more than some schoolboy crush or temporary lust that would go away with one orgasm. If that were the case, I’d be over her by now.
Every time she’s near, my skin buzzes and my heart races. Her touch, no matter how light or innocent, sets my skin on fire. I’m always craving more. More time with her. More smiles from her. More accidental contact—and definitely more of the intentional kind.
Henderson snickers, bumping his cup against mine. “You’ve got it bad, huh?”
I want to glare at him, but I can’t.
Because I do.
I pick up Gemma’s cup now that it’s cooled down. “You have no idea,” I tell him, walking into the living room and seeing the number one girl in my life curled up on the sofa.
And, suddenly, I can picture Honor curled up under her favorite blanket with her.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
Honor
Ifollow thesound of running water in the kitchen, stopping at the doorway to see Sylvia washing the last of the supper dishes. I’d been late coming home from work after helping Karina with some last-minute media prep leading up to tomorrow’s match against the Penguins, so I missed the dinner I’ve tried having once a week with them.
