Page 46 of Taming the Scot
“Thank ye,” Euan said with a nod.
Anastasia led the sisters ahead while Emilia nodded for Bronwen to stay behind. They slowed their steps so that Euan and his sisters could walk out of hearing range.
“I’ve put your box in the carriage,” Emilia said quietly. “The one I had for safekeeping.”
Bronwen could have cried with relief and joy at her cousin’s thoughtfulness. Though the things inside were of no consequence to anyone else, they meant so much to her. A shiny button she’d found between the cobbles. A lady’s white glove dropped from a carriage, which still retained the silky feel to this day. She’d washed it a dozen times to get out the stain of the mud it had fallen in. Half a walnut shell from the first time she’d sung in a pub, and the barkeep tossed her the nut as payment. A lock of her mother’s hair. These tiny treasures that anyone who might look inside would think rubbish.
“I can no’ thank ye enough for all ye’ve done.”
“Aye, ye can, and ye have. What is family for?” Emilia put her arm around Bronwen’s shoulder and hugged her gently. “I’ll see ye soon.”
Emilia gave them all a salute, and she and Anastasia walked back toward the ships.
Bronwen eyed the two carriages arranged for them. Which one held her treasure box? Which one was she to ride in? She wanted to sit with Euan but thought it best if she didn’t. But the decision was made for her as the sisters split up, with the four youngest in one carriage and the two oldest climbing in quickly with Euan. Well, she supposed she had no other choice but to get in. The footmen watched her, one offering her assistance, thinking she hesitated because she couldn’t climb in on her own.
Bronwen smiled and said, “Nay, thank ye,” then forced herself to climb in.
Euan sat beside Amabel, with Maggie opposite her sister, leaving the only open spot across from the man she couldn’t stop thinking about. She took her seat, their knees brushing, and she bit the inside of her cheek to keep all the sensations from whipping themselves into a frenzy at that touch, and willed her brain to focus on the ride rather than the passengers.
Once the footman had closed the door, she stared at it, expecting it to be wrenched off its hinges at any second. Someone had seen her getting in, had rushed the carriage, and would—
Bronwen breathed a sigh of relief when the carriage lurched forward. Thank God. Her imagination was going to drive her mad.
They made their way toward the city of Edinburgh from the docks at Leith. The curtains were open, and though she sat back to keep her face from the view of those they passed, she did look out. They bypassed what had been the parts of town she knew well. The parts where Maggie and Amabel and the rest would never dare to venture for fear of their lives.
Men and women were working. Children too. Fruit sellers, butchers, bakers. Lads selling papers, lasses selling flowers. Women were hanging laundry, dragging their bairns to and fro. Wagons, carts, sorry-looking mules. The street was perpetually wet. Some people stood proudly, smiling. Others looked downtrodden. Their expressions, feelings could all change on a day-to-day basis. Just as hers had. One day feeling mostly safe, and the next, orphaned when her parents were murdered.
As they passed, she sensed Euan’s gaze on her, watching, assessing. Had he figured out that was where she was from? Had she given it away so easily? She’d told him about her parents, about how she’d been running away from their creditors, but she’d not divulged where she was from.
She glanced up at him, meeting his gaze, and gave a subtle nod. Why withhold the truth now? Euan nodded in return, and there was not the pity or disgust in his eyes that she’d expected, but rather understanding and acknowledgement.
And then they were driving around Charlotte Square, and she remembered what Euan had said during one of their lessons, about how driving through had been dull without his pretend love—her. She slanted her gaze at him, and his blue eyes were sparkling as he smiled at her, clearly thinking about the same thing.
Her heart skipped a beat, and she focused her attention back out the window as they passed into the more prestigious areas of the city. The places where if she’d been caught going before she’d be accused of stealing. The hairs on the back of her neck prickled, and the contents of her stomach curdled. She had such a sudden bad feeling about being here, and if she didn’t calm down soon, she would surely go mad. Nothing was going to happen to her; she had to believe that.
Euan had promised his protection and that of his friends. And he did appear to have friends in very high places if he considered the Duke of Sutherland to be one of his best mates.
But memories of the men who’d threatened her haunted her vision, and she could barely follow along with the conversation in the carriage, despite Maggie’s attempts to pull her in.
“Are ye all right?” Maggie asked with a slight touch to Bronwen’s hand.
She jerked away as if she’d been burned, then felt immediately guilty for having done so. Maggie stared at her with concern, and she could feel Euan and Amabel’s stares.
“I’m so sorry,” Bronwen said with a laugh. “Ye surprised me is all. I was deep in thought. I’ve only been gone from the city for a few weeks, but it could have been years.”
“I feel the same way,” Maggie said.
“Were ye thinking about your family?” Amabel asked, earning her a fierce look from her brother and a little hiss of warning from Maggie.
Bronwen smiled apologetically at Amabel. For some reason, the question no longer bothered her. She felt accepted by the Irvines, and their concern was genuine. “’Tis all right. I was.” The men who were after her were only chasing her down because of her family, so she wasn’t exactly misspeaking.
Had Euan divulged her secret? Well, she supposed he wouldn’t have to, given they’d all been listening at the door. And surprisingly, Bronwen wasn’t bothered by them knowing her past. She almost felt more at ease. Because they knew and hadn’t shunned her. They’d embraced her, wanted her to come with them and be a part of their family.
“I’m sorry. Being back here must bring out some memories ye’d rather leave behind,” Maggie said.
Bronwen nodded, feeling a little bit as if she were choking. Maggie had no idea how bad those memories were or what the recollections were doing to her. But as she cast her glance out the window, she caught sight of Euan, whose gaze had permanently seemed to settle on her, boring through into her soul.
How she wished she could unburden herself to him completely. How she felt powerless against the urge. He knew why she’d left the city; he knew some of the threats she’d received, but what a relief it would be to tell him all that had happened before she’d arrived on his doorstep. Tell him the truth about herself and her past. To not have to live alone with the memories.
