Page 136 of Endgame
Resentment and longing turn me into a weak person.
Not weak enough to forgive her parents though.
Winston will suffer. In a few weeks, after this forced marriage and my future actions bring him to his knees, he will.
That’s what I need. What Iwant. Destroying him and his wife.
Not Aurora, not anymore.
Until I’ve dealt with the other Clarkes, I’ll keep my distance from her. It’ll cut her, but better that than leaving her with a weak excuse for a husband.
Marriage, true love, goodness—this connection to Aurora that I can no longer resist—I don’t deserve any of it. As long as my revenge on Winston isn’t over, I’m not worthy of anything.
Especially not of Aurora’s love.
24
AURORA
Aweek has gone by since Everett punished me.
Since we had an actual conversation.
Since he told me he couldn’t be anything other than a bastard.
Apparently, he could. See, Everett hasn’t been his usual cruel self since.
He hasn’t been ignoring me either.
But lines likeGood morning,Good evening,How’s your day been?andOpen up if you want to eatare just as bad…if not worse.
It’s awful, these slivers of his attention. Of his words.
They’re a reminder of what he won’t let me have—his touch, his affection. As much as I’ve resented both, I need them. I need him.
He might be terrible, but he’s mine. He’s the first and only man I ever had a crush on.
The only person who genuinely looked at me. Saw me.
Every day, I give it my everything, trying to bring him back to me.
I crawl to him as soon as he steps through the door of our bedroom after work. Wear the butt plug he loves so much.
I want to believe he’s trying too. Everett pats my head, his mouth twitching. The emotions that are locked behind his sharp façade are fighting to break through.
When he thinks I’m asleep, Everett lies beside me. He whisperswifelike it means something. Like I mean something. He puts his arm around me. Slides close to me, pressing his hard body to my back.
But only when I have my eyes closed and my breath under control.
It’s these moments that I know that his feelings for me have evolved.
No more hate. No more resentment.
Actual feelings.
And then I wake up. Then, all I get is his cold shoulder and our routine.
Slowly but surely, loneliness has been wrapping itself around my bones. Every night, while I wait for Everett to return to our bedroom, I’m nothing more than a wretched heart and conflicted thoughts.
