Page 97 of Looking for Love in All the Haunted Places
“It’syou, pretending. That’s the word you’re looking for.”
“Well, if I’m pretending, then so are you,” she challenged. They needed to have an agreement in place that they could both be happy with. They needed to decide together, openly and honestly. Didn’t he understand that? “Pretending you’re ‘fine’ isn’tgoing to do either of us any good. You can’t surprise me with this later on. I need you to tell me if this is something important to you because I honestly feel like it is. All my cards are on the table, and you can barely match my honesty.”
“Because I only have one card.” Maverick hesitated. “Iwantyou to want me as desperately as I want you.”
“You think I don’t want you?” She climbed onto his lap, placing her hands on his shoulders. “I want you to listen to me very carefully. I’m going to speak slowly to ensure you understand every word. No, I don’t have a well of unbridled passion to pull from. It’s never going to feel like that so make your peace with it now.”
“Lucky—”
“Do not interrupt me.” She kissed him long enough to make her point. “Do you have any idea how hard all of this has been for me? I have never been this vulnerable in my life. I’ve shared things with you I planned to take to my grave, alone and unloved. But you ruined that when you promised to keep me safe, because I believed you. I still believe you. I want you to be happy and I want to be the one who makes you happy.Me. I want you more than I have ever wantedanyone, but I will never sacrifice myself to do that. And now I know that you would never ask me to.
“I know you and you see me. I’m yours and you are mine. Any questions?”
His smile was as criminal as it was transcendent. “No, ma’am.”
“Good.” Lucky kissed him, as gently as she could manage while caressing the curve of his jaw. His hands finally left her hips to tentatively travel up the back of her shirt. The heat from his hands permeated her skin, reaching down to her muscles. Maintaining eye contact, she whispered against his lips, “Becauseyou make mefeelsafe.” She brushed her nose against his. “I want us to get to a place where youfeelcomfortable telling me what you need.”
Lucky had told him everything, but she knew from his uncertain touches and hard-won smiles that he’d barely gotten started. Maverick wasn’t where she was. Not yet.
30
Lucky felt like a teenager sneaking back into the house after a night out, hoping their parents wouldn’t hear them skulking around, which was silly.
Until she made eye contact with Xander waiting for her in the sitting room.
“Hey, what are you doing here?” She smiled as if nothing were wrong. They never explicitly stated she couldn’t go out. She hadn’t technically broken any production rules. Semantically speaking, her conscience was clear.
His withering glare melted the smile clean off her face. He wasn’t mad! He was disappointed! Infinitely worse!
“I can explain,” she began.
“I know where you were. I’m perfectly capable of discerning why you were there,” he said. “What I do not understand is why you believe it’s acceptable not to perform your job as requested. Your presence is required in the house at night, every night. Igranted you leave for an entire weekend. Was that not enough of a break?”
Lucky paused, deeply confused. His seething expression contrasted with his concerned tone. “Is that a rhetorical question or are you genuinely asking?”
He sighed. “Come sit down.”
She sat on his right on the green velvet couch again.
“I’ve personally been monitoring your self-tapes daily. Initially, I began to believe the house had no intentions of presenting specters to you, and then you stupidly asked for them.”
“Stupidity implies I made a mistake,” she countered. “I move with intention inside this house.”
He regarded her for a moment. “You’re not afraid of them.”
“They’re not real. Hennessee can’t use my brain against me. I thought it might be able to, but no.”
“You expect me to believe you’re not affected at all, whatsoever.”
“I wouldn’t go that far. The specters shocked the hell out of me at first.” She laughed. “I’m honestly not afraid. But seeing them is…upsetting. Extremely upsetting.” Her confession came out as a whisper.
“I suspected as much.” He nodded. “That’s why I instructed Maverick to stop you from following me. I didn’t want to risk my experience influencing yours in any way.”
“What does it make you see?”
“My stepmom. She asks me to follow her outside.” A faraway look clouded his eyes. “We sit at the back of the orchard, and she wants to talk to me about new projects at work. Asks me when I’m going to get married. Wonders why I don’t visit her more often.”
“Your stepmom, is she…”
