Page 28 of The Romantic Agenda

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“About said changes?”

“You’re a smart one,” Joy teases. “This whole best friend setup is really blowing my mind, though. Why would she bother doing all of this?”

“Aren’t you supposed to be obsessed with bad puns?” Fox’s friendly assessing squint nearly makes her laugh. “I’m surprised you didn’t say ‘The Ex-Trap.’ You know, likeThe Parent Trap.”

Joy laughs. “Okay, one, I am, and that wasexcellent. Unfortunately, two, it doesn’t exactly fit because I’m not Malcolm’s ex.”

“What?” Fox looks genuinely confused. “I just assumed that—”

“Nope. Never.”

No dates. No flings. No drunken one-night stands. But there was one kiss.

Years ago, during college, she and Malcolm were at a bar with their friends. Somewhere in between sober and sloppy drunk, they had found themselves alone in a hallway. He stood so close to her she almost forgot how to breathe. When he leaned down, nose brushing against hers, she’d been sure her heart would stop before what was happening could happen. It hadn’t.

That one kiss with Malcolm changed the course of her life story for the second time.

It took five years for her to realize it’d barely been a footnote in his.

Fox says, “That changes things.”

“How so?”

He’s silent long enough for Joy to get bored while waiting for him to explain. She gets up and gathers the cold ingredients to start the raspberry ganache while he continues to take his sweet time thinking. To keep the pressure on him, she throws well-timed eager glances in his direction while cooking, but the most he does is bite his lip. It takes nearly ten minutes for him to finish his thought.

“They’re trying to pair us up, so what if we did? Let’s give them exactly what they want and see what happens.”

Eight

Joy blinks at him once, twice, and a third time. She waits for the punch line, not at all picking up what Fox dropped.

“Stay with me,” Fox says slowly. “Malcolm is obsessed with you.”

“It’s not just him.” Joy fidgets from a modicum of self-aware discomfort. “We know that we’re... how do you say, preoccupied with each other?”

“Joy, I knew you before I even saw your face because all he does is talk about you. I don’t even think he realizes that everything he says somehow circles back to you.My friend Joy saw that movie and she loved it,I took my friend Joy there,my friend Joythis, andmy friend Joythat—he always has something to say about you. About how wonderful you are.”

She winces knowing she’s just as guilty of doing the same. “We’re working on it. Sort of.”

“So you can admit there’s more to it, but he can’t? I think that’sbecause he hasn’t realized it yet. Making him jealous might do the trick.”

“Nope. Not gonna work.”

“Have you tried it before?”

“Also nope.”

“Then how do you know it won’t work?” Fox asks earnestly. “Let’s put it to the test. We pretend like we’ve hooked up and go overboard with PDA in front of him to see if something sticks.”

“You trying to ram your tongue down my throat and dry hump me will look super fake. Or things will really go sideways, and he’ll try to fight you for making me uncomfortable. I’m asexual.” Joy can’t stop herself from laughing at his suddenly bewildered expression. “And so is Malcolm.”

“Seriously?”

“I’m a card-carrying member. Ran for club president twice.” She winks at him.

“Are you winking because you’re joking or...?”

“You know how bisexuals get cool jackets and finger guns? Aces get winks.”