Page 6 of Let's Talk About Love
“It was. Still is. The Internet is forever and you never deleted that blog.” She giggled as his eyes widened.
“Well.” He cleared his throat. “This isn’t about me. If you need to cry, then cry, but just promise me you won’t do it in front of Feenie, please.” He glanced at the doorway before lowering his voice. “I’vealready had to talk her out of driving to Margot’s house this week. Twice.”
“But she lives in Iowa.”
“Twice,” he repeated. “You know how she gets.”
Feenie had always been (lovingly) overprotective of Alice. If she had told Feenie what Margot had actually said, Feenie would probably disappear into the night and her mug shot would be everywhere in the morning.
Technically, if it weren’t for Feenie, Alice would have never met Margot.
The apartment complex ran specials for college students, waiving the need for a cosigner as long as they had proof of enrollment and paid three months up front instead of two. They had even allowed pets. (Their cat, Glorificus, was most likely snoring under the couch.)
ApparentlyRyan’s application for the apartment got accepted at the last minute andapparentlyit was too good of a deal to pass up. Instead of all three of them living on campus at Bowen State University, they had both ditched her in favor of shacking up together.
Angry wasn’t the word, but Alice’s hurt settled in with a nice bitter aftertaste. She loved them, so she got over it. Before she even had time to mentally prepare herself for living with a stranger, Margot had breezed into her life.…
“Again with the waterworks,” Ryan said with affection. He pulled her into a hug, resting his chin on the top of her head. “There’s a few more boxes. We’ll take the truck back to the rental place so you don’t have to worry about it.”
He walked away, pausing at the door. “I know it sucks, but breaking up isn’t the end of the world.”
She loved Ryan, truly did with her whole heart, and wouldn’t wish a breakup on anyone, but that boy needed some perspective. He was delusional if he expected her to believe that he wouldn’t fall apart ifFeenie left. She was the only girlfriend he had ever had. Once, when they were ever so slightly high, he crowed on and on about how lucky he had been to find Feenie so early and how he wouldn’t have to spend the rest of his life searching for The One.
“You believe in that?” Alice had asked.
“Yeah. Soulmates are real. God says so. Watch, one day you’ll find yours and you’re going to remember this moment and finally begin to respect and revere me for the prophet that I am. He has a plan for us all.”
(Being high tended to turn Ryan’s brain into sentimental and religious mush.)
Back then, Alice had shaken her head at him. She didn’t even know if she had wanted to date yet, but she also didn’t have any doubts about her asexuality. She had spent countless hours thinking and coming to terms with what that meant, the kind of future she wanted to have, and if that could possibly include another person.
The bottom line was her body had never shown so much as a flicker of sexual interest in anyone. But that didn’t mean she liked being alone. That didn’t mean she wasn’t lonely. That didn’t mean she didn’t want romance and didn’t want to fall in love. It didn’t mean she couldn’t love someone just as fiercely as they loved her.
***
THE AFTERNOON BECAMEa blur of movement. Ryan followed her unpacking lead; his extra inches of height came in handy, and he was good with a hammer. Feenie mostly complained. They had stopped for lunch, sitting on the floor and using upturned boxes as tables, and decided to watch a show about an out-of-control police precinct with a hilarious cast of characters when Alice’s phone rang.
(A large pizza—half extra cheese, half pineapple, and real bacon. Not that Canadian stuff.)
(It’s ham. Canadian bacon is literally ham.)
“It’s my parents,” Alice explained, getting up and stepping out of the room. “Hi, Mom.”
“How are you? What are you doing?” Her mom had a remarkably high speaking voice and her singing voice was the star of their church’s choir. No one expected her to sound the way she did—like a Disney Princess in action.
“Good. I’m unpacking now.” She braced herself during the extra beat of silence.
“I’m happy that you’re happy, but I really don’t understand why you couldn’t move home for the summer. It’s not too late, sweetie. Your room is still set up.”
She leaned against the wall, suppressing a sigh. “I’m not moving back, Mom. How’s Christy?”
“Tired, worried, but coping. Nothing unusual.”
“And Adam?”
“He’s strong for Christy. I know he wishes you were here right now.”
“Mom, please stop. I feel bad enough.”
