Page 57 of Lily In The Valley
I opened the group chat with Xavier, Wesley, Nessa, Lynn, Nyah, and Kelly. They were deep in a debate about some podcast arguing gender roles and relationships. The usual chaos. I scrolled, mostly bored, until I saw it.
Kelly had been active.
A few laughing emojis. A SpongeBob GIF. Her name mixed in with replies from everyone else. Participating. Laughing. Showing up. Just not with me.
Me
So you can joke in the group chat, but you can’t respond to my messages?
I almost typed something more. Something slick. Something real. Something that would’ve bled too much. I deleted it instead. Needy wasn’t a good look. Not for me. Not with her.
I didn’t planto drive to her house.
I just…kept driving. Searching the Houston streets for something to ground me. Then I was turning on her street like muscle memory.
Her car was in the driveway. Lights off. Curtains drawn like she didn’t want the world to see her folding. I sat outside fora while. Fifteen minutes, maybe twenty, just watching the front door like it might blink or open or breathe.
Then I knocked.
Once. Twice.
No answer.
I stepped back, heart thudding the way it always did when I was trying not to care too much. That was when Xavier texted me.
Zay
Say, nigga. Pull up and help me finish these floors in the nursery before Nessa break my neck.
I didn’t answer right away. But eventually, I headed back to my car, reversed out of the driveway, turned my wheel, and left her house behind.
Xavier’s place smelled like sawdust and baby powder. Nessa sat on a stool near the floor to ceiling windows of their living room, painting away on a canvas. She waved when I walked in behind Xavier.
“Khalil,” she greeted me excitedly before scrunching up her face. “You okay?”
“I’m straight,” I answered, following Xavier upstairs to the nursery.
We got to work, hammering away at the wooden planks. He didn’t press. We joked a little, mostly letting the music and motions carry the moment. The sound of a hammer hitting something too soft to be the floor sounded, followed by a shouted curse from Xavier.
“Fuck!” He grimaced, holding his thumb.
“I told you I could’ve grabbed the pneumatic nailer from the construction site.”
“Shut the fuck…” he shot back, annoyed. He threw the hammer away from him and sat back against the wall. “I’m taking a break.”
As if on cue, Vanessa entered with two bottles of water. “Here,” she said, offering me one. “Y’all look thirsty.”
Her phone rang out from her other hand. She glanced at the screen and smiled.
She answered the FaceTime. “Lynn! Where are you?”
“Girl,” she said, laughing. “Kelly got me out here drinking beer. Beer!”
My ears perked up. Vanessa looked over at me with wide eyes. She started to leave the room, then stilled when I shook my head. I stood and walked over to look at her phone. The screen lit up with Kelly and Lynn’s faces. Both were seated at some outdoor table in a beer garden. Neon lights spilled over Kelly’s cheeks. Her eyes were slightly glossy. The loose waves of her hair fell around her shoulders like she’d just stepped out the chair.
She smiled the fake ass smile she saved for strangers. Beside her, two dudes leaned in close, enraptured with her. Laughing too hard at whatever she was saying. By then, Xavier had made his way over and saw what I saw.
“Damn,” he muttered low.
