Page 3 of Oh My Gourd
three
Tori
That’s it, I’m swearingoff men for good. All they are, are trouble with a capital T, and right now that T stands for Thanksgiving.
How did one little lie end up with me here, in my hot boss’s car on our way to his childhood home to spend Thanksgiving with his family?
Damn you, Niles. I wonder if I could hire someone to cast a spell on him or make me a voodoo doll of him. I feel my lips curl into an evil smile at the thought of stabbing his cloth body with sharp pins.
“I hope that smile isn’t for me.” Mace laughs as he takes his eyes off the road to glance at me for what feels like the hundredth time during the last hour we’ve been in the car together. His subtle glances and light touches are messing with my body.
“No, it’s for Niles getting us into this mess,” I confess. When he raises an eyebrow at me, I know I’ve been caught. “Alright, so I’m just as much to blame for this situation as Niles is. I never should have thrown myself at you at the restaurant and forced you to be my fake boyfriend.”
“I don’t mind pretending to be your boyfriend, but I should probably warn you that my family can be a bit over the top.” He warns, but there’s a tone of love in his voice whenever he talks about his family.
“Anything would be better than my family get togethers. I’m an only child, so it’s usually me dividing my time between my father’s house and whichever young woman he’s dating or my mother’s house and whoever her current husband is having a formal meal.”
“That sounds terrible. I thought my family was bad, but my parents actually get along with each other and their spouses. They will probably all be at Grandma’s house tomorrow, even some of their exes will be there.”
“Well, I wasn’t even invited to either of my parents' homes this year. Both of them are dating people younger than me, so they thought it would be awkward if I were there as the third wheel.” I try not to cringe at the thought of my soon-to-be stepparents being younger than I am. “My parents fight like cats and dogs when they’re in the same room together, add a couple of arrogant dates in their early twenties, and you have the perfect making of an episode of Jerry Springer.”
“You’re lucky my grandmother used to watch the Jerry Springer Show when I was a teenager, or I wouldn’t have any idea who you’re talking about.” He gives me a side glance, a little smirk playing along his mouth.
“Sure, it was your grandmother who watched the show.” I tease, loving how easy and natural it is to talk to Mace. I almost forget he’s my boss and that we aren’t a real couple…almost.
“So you never told me what it was like dating my ex-stepbrother.” His tone is light and playful, but I can see the tense set of his jaw like he’s preparing for me to declare my undying love for Niles.
“Honestly, he was a creep from the very beginning. First, he tried to impress me by taking me to an expensive restaurant and letting me order whatever I wanted—his words, not mine. Second, he tried to push his way into my apartment for a“nightcap.” Even going so far as to say I owed him something for spending all that money on dinner.”
“So why the second and third dates if the first date was so bad?” I can feel the anger radiating off Mace, not at me but at the way Niles treated me.
“I’m not entirely sure, honestly. At first, I thought maybe he was nervous and couldn’t help how he was acting,” I shrug. “We worked in the same office building. He was always stopping by my floor and talking with my co-workers. He seemed like a nice guy, so I let the first couple of disastrous dates slide. But after that third date, I knew I had to end things.” I pause for a moment, wondering how much I should tell Mace about his ex-stepbrother. It doesn’t seem like he really likes him that much, but I’ve been fooled before by guys. “That third date, Niles didn’t even pretend we were going out. He took me to a restaurant inside a hotel, where I thought we were going to have dinner, but when he bypassed the restaurant and dragged me straight to the elevator, telling me we were going up to his room so that I could pay up first, my self-defense training kicked in. I was able to get away without so much as a scratch, but Niles ended up with a black eye and a bloody nose.”
“Way to go, slugger.” Mace’s body relaxes once I finish telling him my story. “You said he worked in the same building as you and was always on your floor. How did he handle getting dumped that way?”
“He didn’t handle it very well. He made my life a living hell for about a month before I decided to resign and look for a new job.”
“Why didn’t you go to the Human Resources manager and tell them how he was harassing you?”
Here comes the part I was dreading, “Because his father owns the building and the company I worked for.”
He’s silent for a few minutes before finally speaking, “His dad, Ted, is a good guy. He would have investigated the situation and been fair with his findings.”
“You’re probably right, but I couldn’t take the risk. I had never met Mr. Hastings, so I had no reason to believe he would side with me over his son.” Luckily, I’m saved from the rest of this conversation as we pull into the driveway of Mace’s mother’s house.
four
Mace
I’m still reeling fromthe information Tori shared with me about how Niles treated her while I was introducing her to my mom, grandmother, and sisters.
“You’re such a pretty thing.” My grandmother takes Tori’s hand and spins her around in a circle. “Nora.” She calls to my mother.“Did you see her wide hips? They’re perfect for birthing giant babies that come from this family. And her large breasts could feed an army.”
“Grandma.” I hiss. The last thing I want is for Tori to feel like a prized cow up for auction.
“What?” she feigns innocence. “The men in this family are born huge and stay huge.” She’s not wrong—I’m six foot four inches. Lucky for me, Tori is also tall. She’s probably around five ten, five eleven.
“Yes, but try not to scare Tori off before she even gets settled in.” It might have been only a two-hour drive, but we started late. I’d love nothing more than to take a shower and go to bed with Tori by my side. However, I promised my sisters we would go to the country western bar in town for dinner and dancing.
