Page 93 of Impossible
“You have security here,” Evie said, sounding irritated. “This is far greater than anything agentlemancan give you. Particularly one who took advantage of his station as your employer.”
Ada wasn’t surprised by Evie’s reaction, nor did it bother her. “I was as much to blame as he was. He didn’t take anything I didn’t freely offer.” She belatedly realized they were having this conversation in front of Lucien. Heat climbed her neck, and she cast a nervous glance toward him.
“I’m afraid I agree with Evie,” he said. “He absolutely took advantage, even if you encouraged him. Gentlemen don’t conduct liaisons with their governess or any of their other employees, for that matter.”
Ada knew she’d been naïve and forlorn. She’d wanted a connection with anyone, and Jonathan had wanted that too. “But he’s here now declaring his love and proposing marriage. Our behavior in the past was wrong, but I won’t blame him for it when I was an eager participant.”
“Do you still love him?” Evie asked softly. “When I first met you, I wondered if you’d ever get over leaving him. But you haven’t mentioned him in a very long time. Indeed, I’m not sure you spoke of him after we left Cornwall.”
Because Ada had promised herself that she would leave him and the love she’d felt for him there when she’d come to London with Evie. So, she’d never spoken of him.
Evie’s question thundered in her mind: did she still love him?
“No, I don’t love him anymore.” The answer came fast and certain. “I am fond of him, and I always will be. He gave me solace and hope when I had none.”
A shocking thought rose in her mind: perhaps she hadn’t really loved Jonathan at all. Or perhaps it was that her love, or the way she loved, had changed. Because what she felt for Max was wholly different. Max made herfeelbrighter than the sun.
But Max wasn’t offering marriage nor would he ever.
“If you’ll excuse me, I’ve work to do.” Ada summoned a half-hearted smile and returned to the ladies’ side of the club.
Chapter19
The Duke of Evesham’s butler showed Max up to the drawing room. In his youth, Max had been in this house several times before with Lucien. It looked much the same and still carried the austere elegance one would associate with the duke.
But Max wasn’t here to see Lucien’s father. He was calling on Lucien’s aunt, Lady Peterborough. She was currently residing with her brother after leaving her husband’s household. Prudence had told Max that once her existence was known, Lord Peterborough had tried to send his wife to a convent in Wales. Evesham had intervened and brought his sister here.
Lady Peterborough was not in the drawing room when Max went in. The butler left him to meander about the room. He removed his hat and did a circuit before realizing he was nervous. He took a position near a window and Lady Peterborough swept in, her dark-brown-and-gray hair intricately styled atop her head, a coral necklace at her throat, and a persimmon gown cloaking her round frame.
The countess didn’t get very far, for as soon as she saw Max, she stopped short, her gaze fixing on him. “Good heavens, you look even more like your father now.” She blinked and moved toward him. “Except for those nasty scars, of course.” She spoke matter-of-factly, without a hint of malice, and he assumed she was a woman who said what she wanted. He respected that. It also meant he would learn what he came to discover. He hoped that would be the case.
“You knew my father very well,” he said, not certain how to begin.
She laughed softly as she sailed to a chair near the center of the room and sat down. “I think you know that since you are aware of your half sister, who is my daughter. Thank you for giving her a dowry, even if it was late.” She wrinkled her nose slightly as she clasped her hands in her lap.
Max took a chair opposite her and rested his elbow on the arm. “I was quite shocked to learn about her,” he said evenly. Hell, if she was going to speak plainly, so was he. “I keep saying that, but the truth was that I was hurt and furious to learn my father had been unfaithful to my mother.”
“And not just with me.” She pressed her lips together. “You may not have known that. I apologize.”
“I did not,” he said tightly, wondering if he’d ever known his father at all. “I suppose that means he didn’t really love my mother, that he was unhappy with her.”
“I don’t think that’s necessarily true.” The countess tipped her head as she regarded him. “Honestly, he didn’t talk about your mother, and I didn’t ask.”
“I believe you were otherwise occupied,” he said sardonically and with a hint of enmity.
“Being lovers, you mean. It was more than that. I cared deeply for him. He was a wonderful man. His death saddened me greatly.”
He didn’t give a damn about her feelings regarding his father. “Wonderful men aren’t adulterous.” Max hated him anew even as he missed him terribly. “His death devastated me, as did my mother’s.”
“Of course,” she murmured. “Why have you come today?”
This was where he struggled to explain. “I suppose I wanted to know about your relationship with him, whether you loved each other.”
“I have been trapped in an unhappy marriage, and your father was charming and complimentary. He made me feel…exceptional.” There was a glimmer of something in her eye. She may not have loved his father, but he could see that she had indeed cared for him.
“Did my mother know about you or Prudence?”
“I don’t think so, but I can’t say for sure. Your father was very supportive when I told him I was carrying. I’d hoped Peterborough would just accept the child as his own since I’d already given him an heir and a spare.”
