Page 115 of Babies for the Christmas Grump
A life where I could wake up, go to work, solve problems, and leave the emotional stuff for people who had the luxury to deal with it.
The truth is, I built this life so I wouldn’t have to face the kind of mess I was born into. I wanted order, certainty, a future I could predict.
Kids? A wife? A family? It was never part of the plan.
But with her…
With Sunny…
I don’t know when it changed. I don’t know when I started to look at her differently.
But now, with this news, this news that has me frozen in a place I don’t know how to navigate, I can’t ignore it anymore. I can’t just shut it out as I do with everything else that’s uncomfortable or uncertain.
There’s a part of me, an undeniable part, that wants this. Her. All of it.
I never expected to feel that way, not like this.
I want to be a father now. I want to be there for her, for our kids, for whatever comes next.
But it’s not that simple.
I lean back against the headboard, staring at the door she just stormed through, trying to make sense of it all.
I’ve spent my life keeping people at arm’s length, keeping things clean, neat, and manageable. But with her, everything is messier.
She’s untidy, chaotic in the best possible way. She challenges me, cracks open the walls I’ve built around myself and makes me question everything I thought I wanted.
And that’s terrifying.
I’m used to handling problems. I’m used to being the one with answers. But this—this is the one thing I can’t control. It’s her. It’s us. It’s the unexpected future we’re being thrust into.
And I can’t help but think I’ve already messed it up, just by being frozen in place, unable to react in the way she needs.
I need to talk to someone.
I’m still reeling, trying to process everything that’s just happened. Sunny, her news, the way I failed her. The silence, and the distance.
Everything that just happened unravels faster than I can keep up with. And now she’s gone, leaving me alone with my mess of thoughts.
I can’t stay here.
I push myself off the bed, grabbing my phone from the side table. My mind is jumbled, but one thing cuts through: Nolan—my assistant.
He’s the one person I can count on to help me think clearly when everything else feels too complicated. If I can’t talk to Sunny right now, I need someone who can ground me.
I type out a quick message to him:
Need to talk. Meet me in the office.
It’s not much, but I need the distraction, and I need to get my head straight before I go after her again.
I don’t wait for a reply. I just throw on my jacket and head out of the room, moving fast.
Every step is a march toward something I’m not prepared for, but I can’t let this sit in the air any longer. I need to act.
When I reach my office, Nolan is already there, standing by the coffee machine with a cup in his hand. As usual, he’s dressed in his sharp black suit, looking far too composed for the kind of morning I’ve had.
But that’s why I need him. Nolan doesn’t let anything get to him. He’s calm and steady. I need that right now.
