Page 34 of Eavesdroppers Never Hear
After about a quarter-minute, Mary said, “Well, that is settled then,” and returned to her meal.
~~~~~
Just before the next course was cleared away, Mrs Bennet asked a bit more about Rosings and Lady Catherine, seemingly unable to get enough.
“The garden in which stands my humble abode is separated only by a lane from Rosings Park, her ladyship’s residence.”
“I think you said she was a widow, sir? Has she any family?”
“She has only one daughter, the heiress of Rosings, and of very extensive property.”
“Ah!” said Mrs Bennet, shaking her head, “then she is better off than many girls. And what sort of young lady is she? Is she handsome?”
“She is a most charming young lady indeed. Lady Catherine herself says that, in point of true beauty, Miss de Bourgh is far superior to the handsomest of her sex, because there is that in her features which marks the young lady of distinguished birth. She is unfortunately of a sickly constitution, which has prevented her from making that progress in many accomplishments which she could not have otherwise failed of, as I am informed by the lady who superintended her education, and who still resides with them. But she is perfectly amiable, and often condescends to drive by my humble abode in her little phaeton and ponies.”
The ladies found the idea of being sole heiress to a large estate terribly romantic. Even though Elizabeth thought Mr Collins was contradicting himself by calling her both handsomeand sickly, she was not one to quibble on any improvement in the conversation.
Lydia and Kitty loved the idea of a rich heiress and spent a good quarter-hour pestering the gentleman for more details on the lady, how she dressed, how she lived, and most importantly—all about her phaeton and ponies.
The more he talked, the more Mrs Bennet thought Lady Catherine might be of some use if she could somehow manage an introduction. That lady obviously had only one daughter to marry off, which should be child’s play.
With that in mind, she started her attempt to work out an appropriate scheme. “How old is Lady Catherine’s daughter?”
“She is five and twenty.”
Mrs Bennet scrunched her face in confusion, unable to make any sense out of the statement.
The matriarch finally decided to just ask. “How is it possible she is not married? Even though you say she is sickly and has not been presented, with an estate of that size for a dowry I should imagine she bats suitors away by the dozen.”
Only the three elder daughters winced at the vulgarity, while the two youngest looked on in eager anticipation and Mr Bennet looked on in amusement.
Mr Collins beamed with all the pleasure of one who had the juiciest gossip to share.
“She has been engaged to her cousin for many years, and Lady Catherine anticipates the long-awaited event will occur this year. Lady Catherine observes they are formed for each other. They are descended on the maternal side, from the same noble line; and, on the father’s, from respectable, honourable, and ancient—though untitled—families. Their fortune on both sides is splendid. They are destined for each other by the voice of every member of their respective houses. The combined estates will be one of the largest in England.”
All Mrs Bennet got out of that description was that the young heiress would soon be out of the way, and Lady Catherine would have nothing to do once Miss de Bourgh’s husband took over Rosings. It seemed a perfect opportunity to get the great lady to aid her with some of her more troubling offspring, such as Elizabeth and Mary.
“Who is this paragon she will wed?” she asked in breathless anticipation.
“Her cousin is the master of a grand estate in the north. I understand it bests Rosings in size and productivity, while nearly matching in elegance.”
“And the name of this estate?” Elizabeth asked suspiciously.
“Pemberly!” he blithely replied, having completely missed the threat in her voice.
Elizabeth frowned until her teeth were ready to break, and she might have said something very intemperate if Mary had not squeezed her hand beneath the table. “Are you implying that Miss de Bourgh is intended for Mr Darcy of Pemberley?”
Collins face lit up almost enough to make him handsome (not handsome per se, but less unhandsome), and his smile could not be hidden. “You have heard of Mr Darcy? I had no idea his fame spread this far, but of course, a man of his consequence must be known everywhere in the kingdom.”
Elizabeth snapped angrily, “Answer the question!”
Collins shook his head. “I imply nothing! I state it as undeniable fact, straight from Lady Catherine’s mouth. Their marriage is as certain as the tides.”
Jane surprised everyone by saying gently, “You might wish to stop conflating Lady Catherine’s opinions with fact, Mr Collins. They might be vastly different things. My mother has asserted my marriage was imminent to at least four men since I came out; yet, here I am—still single.”
That one stunned everyone at the table, even the two youngest. Mrs Bennet seemed prepared to say something egregious, but even she was having trouble working out how to react to Jane showing a bit of fire. As far as the matron was concerned, such an occurrence was unnatural, and not to be encouraged or repeated. Mary taking up the axe suddenly a few days earlier had been far more change than she cared for.
It never occurred to anyone to inform Mr Collins that he was presently sitting in the very chair the Mr Darcy had occupied the previous day.
