Page 16 of Eavesdroppers Never Hear
“How could we possibly object?” Jane asked.
He chuckled. “I am experimenting with an entirely new way of presenting myself in society. I will try being polite and see how it works out.”
Elizabeth and Mary laughed gaily but kept the volume down, as they were afraid of attracting gossips, and they both knew thateavesdroppers never hear anything good of themselves.
“My cousin knows nothing of your family, save what I have written. That means all he knows is that the two eldest Bennet sisters are quite handsome, with the eldest having blond hair. Do any of you wish to disputethat?”
All the sisters shook their head but wondered what the man was working at. It certainly contradicted what he said at the assembly, so perhaps his opinion had shifted over time.
Darcy looked at Mary. “This will sound like shameless boasting, Miss Mary, but I shall prove myself correct. All I ask is that you appear with your sisters to be introduced—but in Miss Elizabeth’s gown, with your hair fixed like hers, without your spectacles since you obviously do not need them in company.Since my cousin knows nothing save the second-eldest sister is handsome, we will challenge him to identify which sister is the handsome one who is not blond.”
They stared, but finally Elizabeth laughed slightly too loudly. “He has boxed you in neatly, Mary. You must choose between being handsome or being right.”
Jane laughed, but then she saw Mary getting nervous. “Do not distress yourself. You need not go along with Mr Darcy’s experiment, but I would like to try it if you can be brave enough. I think you might be surprised when you stop listening to our mother’s nonsense and going out of your way to appear plain.”
Everyone tried not to stare at Mary, even though she had their undivided attention.
Much to the rest of the company’s surprise, Mary eventually laughed gaily. “This is astonishing, Mr Darcy. I believe you jumped out of that grave you dug yourself in a single bound.Impressive!”
Darcy chuckled, then let it expand into a laugh that the sisters had to admit made him seem quite handsome.
“I agree… Lizzy?” Jane sighed.
“Quite!” Elizabeth said emphatically, with surprisingly cordial feelings for the gentleman.
Elizabeth reflected that it could not have been easy to do what he did that day. She would certainly never have enough bravery to do any such thing.
9.Explanations
Mary asked quietly, “Now that you are peacefully aboveground, Mr Darcy, perhaps you could explain why you acted as you did?”
Darcy looked at her and spoke gently. “The only answer for such behaviour is I chose to do so despite knowing better. Anything else is simply excuse making.”
“Perhaps… but I would assume you have made it through dozens of balls and assemblies without giving offence. How was this one different?”
“It was not —”
Jane spoke softly. “We have forgiven but not forgotten. I do think it would be helpful to understand your frame of mind.”
Darcy rubbed his chin in thought, then looked carefully behind the ladies to ensure nobody could overhear.
Mary noticed his movements. “We are watching your back, sir. This is as private as we are ever likely to get.”
Darcy sighed. “Let us imagine I just entered the Assembly Hall.”
Elizabeth giggled and looked embarrassed, but she decided to carry on anyway. “To make this pantomime work, one of us would have to grab your arm hard enough to make your hand go numb.”
Jane and Mary laughed nervously, while Darcy gave a more robust version—though quiet enough to avoid undue attention.
“It is too late to make the tableau perfect as I would also need to have spent the last three hours stuck in a coach with some perfume that would—”
Elizabeth suspected he was thinking something like ‘kill a horse’ and surmised he was trying to refrain from compounding his offences.
“No need to worry about falling back on bad habits. We understand your meaning, and if you manage to offend us, we will only be reaping what we have sown.”
“I vaguely recollect Miss Bennet and Miss Elizabeth were standing with Miss Lucas at about the church doors,” he said, gesturing vaguely in the correct direction.
“That seems right.”
