Page 15 of Eavesdroppers Never Hear
“By all means.”
“One!” Elizabeth said with a laugh, echoed by Darcy and her sisters. It was nervous but a substantial improvement over the murderous intent they started the day with a few hours earlier.
Darcy chuckled gamely. “Miss Bennet, I owe you an apology as well.”
Jane laughed. “For what? I suppose you could apologise for neglecting to take a cricket bat to the drawing room at Netherfield! Your worst offence against me was sitting silently while the Bingley sisters disparaged Lizzy. After that, I can hardly fault you for saying something both true and obvious.”
“Silence implies consent, or at least acquiescence. I was in the wrong. What I said after was hardly polite, whether true or not.”
“Perhaps, but by that standard I should apologise for the things our mother and sisters say every day. And yet, like you, we have learnt to ignore that which we cannot change. The Bingleysisters’ manners, while atrocious, are their own responsibility, while the comfort of guests is the responsibility of the master of the house. A guest owes nothing save politeness to his hosts.”
Darcy stared at her disconcertingly a moment before recollecting himself enough to answer. “I will not dig my hole any deeper by arguing. I do not feel I treated you fairly and am unlikely to be moved from my regret. I offer my abject apology, preferring to err on the safe side.”
Jane shrugged nonchalantly. “As Lizzy says, you are forgiven.”
He glanced to Mary, but she pre-empted him. “You correctly identified me by name, much to my surprise. You owe me nothing.”
Darcy sighed but could not dispute the fact that he had never been introduced to Miss Mary, and he would not have been able to name her without Sir William’s subtle reminder. According to propriety he should not even be speaking to her.
Jane added, “If all accounts are to be paid, I believe we should apologise as well.”
“What on earth for?” he asked, in clear and obvious puzzlement.
Elizabeth took up the yoke with a quiet sigh. “I overheard you at the assembly… every word. Instead of speaking to you or quietly asking my father to do so, I decided to savage your reputation by disparaging you to my friends. My mother got wind of it, so everyone within twenty miles knows the story. Since then, practically every word for the last month was intended to draw blood. It was badly done.”
Darcy laughed awkwardly. “It is no less than I deserve. Nevertheless, before you forget the matter entirely, allow me to say that the words were quite churlish. I apologise and admit my wrongdoing without reservation. They were unkind, untrue, and ungentlemanly.”
Elizabeth scrunched her face. “I will agree with the first and third, but I am unconvinced they were particularly untrue.”
“Of course they were! Bingley had the right of it. Did you hear that part?”
Elizabeth looked slightly confused, so Darcy, in an uncharacteristic bit of silliness, raised his voice and smiled like a fool to emulate his friend.
“I would not be so fastidious as you are for a kingdom! Upon my honour, I never met with so many pleasant girls in my life as I have this evening; and there are several of them you see uncommonly pretty.”
Elizabeth stared at the ground in embarrassment. She did remember it but had focused exclusively on the much less appealing response and mostly forgotten the other gentleman’s words entirely.
“Mr Bingley is quite the flatterer,” Jane said with a frown that Darcy thought presaged a difficult (or impossible) road for Bingley.
“My purpose is neither to praise nor disparage Bingley. I simply noted that he had the more accurate assessment of the local society. I cannot speak to every woman in the room, but all the Bennet sisters are quite handsome.”
“And you were doing so well,” Mary sighed with an uncharacteristic (and surprising) bit of censure in her tone.
Darcy was confused, as were her elder sisters. Jane gently asked if she would care to explain.
Mary looked surprised at herself but gamely continued. “Even with her opinion at its nadir, Elizabeth admired your honesty. Nobody likes to be called unhandsome, but it is an improvement over being lied to, since many men will say anything to get what they want. Flattery does not help your case, sir. It discounts your best feature.”
“At the risk of more censure, I must dispute with you, Miss Mary. Regardless of what your mother might say, all the Bennet ladies are handsome.”
“Now you have shown yourself blind as well as a flatterer,” Mary said emphatically.
Darcy thought carefully about his next words, wondering how in the world he had dug himself yet another hole to climb out of.
“I will not argue, Miss Mary…ifyou will agree to an experiment with a neutral party to resolve our dispute.”
“Such as?” Mary asked suspiciously.
“My cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam, will escort my sister here later in the week. I hope to introduce Georgiana to your family if you have no objections.”
