Page 35 of Queen of the Night
A memory of the night in the tiny cave, the image on the badge in my hand. Ikar and I waking together—I shake it away.
“I can’t trust criminals, or I’d have been dead long before now. I’m sure at any of the villages we stopped at you could have found a way to verify—” I stop myself. “Actually, you know what, this argument is pointless. I don’t work with kings.” I raise my chin to solidify my stance.
He frowns. “That’s an absurd rule and you know it.”
“You lied to me. You hid that from me even after I shared”—I bite my lower lip, fighting back emotion—“everything.”
Tears are burning behind my eyes, and my chest feels heavy, and I know I need to get away before I fall apart. He’s no longermy criminal, or my friend, or someone I could love... he never really was.
“Everything?” His tone is almost mocking. His icy blue eyes drill into my soul, as if he senses what I’ve held back and is ready to force it out. Hold me to my word. Wait for me to spill, literally,everythingright here, right now.
I turn my back, unwilling to meet his gaze, and stalk away. I want to run, but the way my eyes have filled with tears I’d probably biff it and land on my face in my escape, and there’s no coming back from that. Instead, I set my pace to a wide stride and rapidly work to blink back my emotion. I run my sleeve across my nose. I don’t care if he sees. I sniff loudly, and it’s then I notice how still the forest has become—almost too quiet. We must have frightened away the animals with the tension strung tight between us.
“Wrong direction,” he calls, finally breaking the silence.
I look up at the sky and curse before I slowly turn around. “Lead the way,” I grind out.
He pulls the journal out of a pocket in his trousers and flips it open. I openly stare at him as he turns the pages and studies the book, frowning as I try to grasp the reality that Ikar is theking. Maybe it’s shock, maybe it’s my traitorous feelings, but my mind begs for me to keep him safely labeled as my criminal again.
He glances up and catches me staring, but I refuse to look away like a coward.
Our gazes war for a moment before he finally speaks. “Darvy and Rhosse likely have my armor and pack and have left in search of the nymphs. That was our plan in case something like this happened. We need to meet them there as soon as we can.”
I frown deeper. “You’re the only one with the journal.”
He closes it and tucks it safely away. “They have a copy of the most important notes and a guide for the journey in case we got separated. They’ll know to meet us at the nymphs.”
“Wait, why don’t I?” I ask vehemently—nothing like finding out my love interest is my greatest enemy to make me feel all sorts of argumentative.
“I’ve seen you try to read a map; it’s more dangerous than if you didn’t have one at all.”
I sputter as he comes closer, his challenging gaze holding mine. What am I supposed to say when he’s right?He’s always right.Blazing king.
I step back when he comes too near, wondering what he’ll do to me now that I know his secret. Is this when his wicked side will come out? The side I’ve always been taught to fear? I try not to cower when his fingers graze myshoulder as he reaches for the strap of my pack. I attempt to pull away, but he snags it and leans in closer.
“When are you going to learn that you have nothing to fear from me?” he whispers, his rich voice so low and deep that my body traitorously freezes as he gently tugs the heavy pack from my shoulders.
He effortlessly throws it over his own and begins to walk away with his long, confident stride. The action leaves me scowling so deeply I’m sure it’s etched a new wrinkle that will grace my forehead forevermore. This is a manipulation tactic of some sort.It has to be. He’s the ruler of an entire kingdom, which means he’s an expert at that sort of thing. It’s to be expected, isn’t it?
It makes me cringe to admit that I’d rather stick with akingthan brave this dark forest on my own. I’ve never felt so traitorous in my life, but I grudgingly follow him while still drowning in shock. A reasonable voice in my head questions how I can justify being angry with him for hiding something like that when I still hold my secrets close. But I shut it out, in no mood for logic or fairness.
I blow strands of hair from my face angrily as I continue marching, hands too sullied to rebraid my hair. The quick pace helps cool the burn behind my eyes, helps me think. The thing is… I’m not sure if I’m more hurt or afraid. All my life, I’ve been lectured by the Black Tulips, specifically Tatania, that I should take precautions, that I should never work with anyone close to the king, including soldiers of any rank. Oh, and, the biggest, most important one? To never remove my bracelet. Don’t mind me, breaking every blazing rule. I couldn’t have created a worse situation in my imagination if I tried. Here I am, a Black Tulip whose bracelet is going to quit working at any time, in a remote mountain location with the high king, who I’ve kissed.Of all people.
It’s all suddenly so clear… the sense of power that seems woven into his very veins, his manners, the way he holds himself, his skill with weapons, his magic. All of it. I feel like an idiot for not realizing.
I grip the pommel of the sword at my side as we walk, the solidity of the handle an anchor to reality, until I remember it’s the very bantha claw I pulled from Ikar’s leg mere weeks ago. I yank my hand away and sigh heavily. How has he become so much a part of my life in so short a time? In the last three weeks, I’ve done more to mess up my life than in my entire life combined.
I kick an errant pinecone into the brush alongside the path. Bounty hunting assistant was always risky, but paid so well for my magic that it seemed to be my only option to ensure my Tulip dues got paid. Aside from that first bounty job where I almost died, I didn’t realize until I arrested Ikar how much danger I’ve evaded all these years. But even though I took part in dangerous work, I always had the Black Tulips behind me. No matter that I was a misfit. Now, even that’s gone. A sense of isolation yawns before me, waiting to swallow me whole as soon as my bracelet stops working.
I’m on my own now.
A pit grows in my belly as I realize the depth of my trouble. I may not have known that Ikar was the high king, or even that he was a high-ranking officer, when I signed the contract, but the only person I can truly blame is myself. I scoff inwardly, thinking of the job title he gave me.High-ranking officer. I mimic the words with attitude beneath my breath. I’m frustrated that I can’t even call it a lie. I acted as a naive fool, driven by greed and fanciful dreams.
My eyes burn again. All I ever wanted was a simple life. Just me and Rupi and a small shop where I get to sell strange treasures and not have to be an originator. That’s it. I thought it was reasonable… now I know I should’ve just been happy with surviving. It appears that some dreams are better left alone.
Iwillmy bracelet to keep working. Beg it, even. I send it good thoughts and make sure nothing jostles it too much as we journey mile after mile. By the end of the day, I’m a mess of anxiety and worry because I know as soon as it stops working,I’m prime bait.
Chapter 23
