Page 27 of Embers in Our Souls
I’m doing everything I can in this moment to focus, but I’m having a hard time. The sun is strong as it beats down on me in front of the firehouse. I committed to this, excited to launch my first recording in front of the station for my followers to see me in action.
They’ll be eager to see me in firefighting gear and I know it will probably make the Prowlers wild. I don’t fully follow theirantics, but Malloy constantly gives me updates on what they’re chattering about. I’ve decided to come in on my day off and film.
Not sure I’ll regret this next decision, but I’m roping in Malloy’s help too. Too bad I’m lacking enthusiasm as I’m sleeping like actual shit lately. It sucks that something I loved doing for the people that have shown me so much love online is giving me no joy at the moment.
“Dude, what’s up with you today?” Malloy asks, wiping the sweat off his brow.
“I’m just not feeling it. I can’t muster the energy to do this, but I’ll snap out of it.” I look around, irritation the only feeling passing through me as I take in my surroundings. I haven’t told him what Indy said as she left the station the other day.
“I thought you said Cap and the Lieutenant were good with this. Have they been giving you crap or something?” He looks around, as if he’s going to get in trouble.
“No, it’s not about that. Indiana told me she wants a divorce.” I sigh while grabbing another set of weights, giving him my back.
When I turn around, Malloy’s gaping at me, shock evident on his face.
“Listen, I don’t want to make a big deal about it,” I say nonchalantly.
“Hunter, I know you keep things close to the chest, but you don’t have to brush this off. I don’t know your whole history with her, but honestly, you don’t have to pretend with me.”
“I’m not pretending. I’ll get over it. I’m just processing is all,” I lie.
“Hunter,” Malloy continues.
“Seriously, Malloy, it’s not a big deal at all.” I urge.
“Then put the weights down and look at me and say that.” He comes closer to me and crosses his arms.
I put the weights down and mimic his stance. Malloy is a big guy, hovering over me at six foot six. I’m not a short guy atsix two myself, but he’s burly and built like an ox. His trimmed beard is overpowering. If I didn’t know him to be the kindest human, I’d be intimidated, but he’s a marshmallow inside.
“It just threw me off when she told me. I know it’s time. I mean, the marriage is a sham, right? So, why should I care?” I shrug my shoulders, trying to play this off as indifference.
“Because I think you love her deep down, you’re just not owning up to it,” he says. “I don’t know if you’re just ignoring your feelings or you are going to let her go because you think she’s better off without you. Either way, it’s a mistake to walk away without fighting for her.”
“Does it matter at this point? She wants a divorce. She already expressed her wishes,” I confess.
“Hunter, don’t be a fool.” He scoffs.
“Malloy, she wants out. I’m not going to try and force this. I tried that for years with my parents. I don’t need to force someone to try and love me,” I finally admit.
The minute I say it, I see him soften. “Dude, your parents sound like assholes. I’m sorry that’s the upbringing you got. I had a fucknut for a father, so I get half of what you’re saying. But you deserved better, believe me. So for that, I truly am sorry you missed out on having someone good to look up to. But she’s not your parents, Hunt. Just try to talk to her when you see her again. That’s all I ask, alright?”
I nod, taking in what he’s saying. He’s right. I should try to explain my side of things. Hopefully she’ll at least be open to hearing what I have to say, even if it gets me nowhere, I can sleep better knowing she understands why I torched everything between us years ago.
I turn back to grab my weights again while Malloy sets up the camera. He’s started to grasp a little bit of what I do, becoming a good wingman on social media with me.
As we’re about to begin, I hear someone step out from the garage.
“Don’t worry, the true star has arrived!” River’s voice booms. To top it off, he’s got Ella strapped to his chest, her baby legs bouncing as she smiles with her baby teeth showing off at us.
“Oh, Lord. What are you doing here? How the hell did you find out about this?” Malloy groans. “And why do you have Ella?”
It doesn’t stop Malloy from grabbing Ella’s toes and greeting her with a high-pitched voice and pretending to eat her toes as a loud scream of joy comes out of her.
“Are you kidding me? And pass up the opportunity to become the next Station 10 star? Heck to the no!” River flexes his biceps as he struts along the sidewalk. He’s been better about his language now that Ella is starting to become more verbal.
It’s hard not to snicker with his antics. “What are you expecting to do?” I ask him.
“You tell me, boss.” He moves his hand through his hair, as if he’s a model. I can’t contain the eye roll. Then he kisses his niece’s head and tells her, “We’ll break the internet, won’t we my princess? Uncle and Ella are going to be number one on Hunter’s page.”
