Page 155 of Awakened
I spun around, pointing my finger in his face. “You chose to keep your distance. You chose Becca. Don’t put that shit on me.”
The red tint to his skin was no longer embarrassment but pure anger. “Yeah, I tried to do what everyone, including you, expected of me, and I was fucking miserable. The best parts of the last two years were watching your back.”
Shaking my head, I felt overwhelmed. “That’s so fucked up, Seth.”
“You’re right, but it doesn’t make it any less true. Even watching you love another man was better than being at home, pretending to feel more than I did.”
“You told me you loved her.”
He stepped closer, our chests touching. “And I did, but it wasn’t enough. It’s always been you, Les. Since the moment I saw you, I knew you were it for me.”
There was a large spot of blood on Seth’s shirt, and it was growing. He must have reopened a wound. Tracing it, I kept my eyes locked on that spot. “Don’t say that. You don’t mean it.”
Two warm fingers lifted my chin. His dark brown eyes melted away my resolve to banish him to the land of the fuck ups. “I do. You know I do.”
His lips lowered to mine, but at the last second, I turned my face, and they landed on my cheek. “You sexted me.”
He coughed, then groaned.
Our eyes locked. “You flirted and sexted me.”
Lowering his gaze to the ground, he nodded. “I did.”
“That’s really pervy,” I said, my tone light.
“Are you surprised?” The corners of his mouth lifted slightly.
I wanted to laugh, but he needed to understand how much damage there was between us. “Knowing you? No. But I didn’t know it was you. I was starting to feel a fondness for my Secret Creepy Douchebag. I was amazed at how in sync we were with one another. Now I know why.”
He held my hand against his chest, his eyes wide and solemn. “I thought it would be my only chance to have you that way. Saying it out loud, I hear how messed up it is. I’m so sorry. I handled all of this so wrong.”
Gently removing my hand from his grip, I started to walk backward. “I need to go back for the memorial.”
Seth caught up to me in three steps, his arms wrapping loosely around my waist. “Please tell me what I can do. This can’t be it.”
Shaking my head, I tried to find the right words. “I don’t know Seth. I feel like there is too much shit here to get over.”
He drew me closer, leaning his forehead against mine. “I love you, Celeste, so fucking much. I will do anything to fix this. Please.”
His fingers on my skin, scent in my nose, and eyes begging me all worked against my better judgment.
“Fuck it.” I gripped his damp locks, pulling him closer. Tongues tangling, teeth nipping swollen flesh—our kiss was brutal. The exertion of moving through the woods while injured left him salty. Parting my lips, I breathed him in.
We were pressed so tightly together that I could feel his heart racing. He tried to get even closer but ended up putting pressure on one of his wounds.
“Fuck!” He was hurt but didn’t let go of my waist.
His outburst popped our consequence-free bubble.
“We can’t keep doing that.” I carefully removed myself from his grasp.
He frowned. “Why not? We both want to.”
Running a hand through my tangled, greasy hair, I sighed. “Look, if this is ever going to happen, we need to rebuild our friendship first. The romantic stuff can wait. I need to trust you again before I let you magic your way into my pants.”
He smiled. “You still want me around?”
Rolling my eyes, I tried not to tell him just how much. “Duh. But just as friends—for now.”
