Page 78 of Refining the Debutante
“I will go, but you must prepare yourself for when I return.” He and his father rarely disagreed, but when they did, it was not pleasant. His father was always firm in his opinion. Well, Ethan could be just as bullheaded.
* * *
Jane surprised Miranda by calling early in the morning while Lady Callister was still asleep and Miranda was in the breakfast room.
“I need to speak with Lady Callister. The house is in an uproar,” Jane said, waltzing into the room and grabbing a sweet roll as if they had been on friendly speaking terms for some time. “Ethan is leaving London again!”
Miranda’s chest ached with disappointment. Disappointment she had no right to feel. “What sort of business is taking him out of Town?”
“There have been uprisings from the farmers.” Jane’s expression grew serious. “There is not enough food to go around. My father says the real problem is not the food but the beginning of a revolution! Surely you heard about the second Spa Field riot. Who knows what will happen next?”
Miranda had heard, but she was surprised Jane would acknowledge it. “Go on.”
“It is all my father and Ethan have talked about since we arrived in London. Ethan came over last night and argued with him about something—surely pleading the farmers’ case.” Jane’s lip suddenly quivered. “I’m worried. When he bid my mother and me goodnight, I saw fire in Ethan’s eyes. I’ve never seen him so determined. He never loses his temper. Then my father drank himself into a stupor and was ranting like I have never seen. Ethan cannot involve himself in such a tumultuous situation. He could be seriously injured or worse. Someone must speak sense to him.”
“Lady Callister?” Miranda asked.
Jane sighed. “I had hoped, but now I wonder if she would dare interfere. Will you do it?”
Miranda blinked rapidly. “Me? Why not ask Miss Withers?”
Jane gave an impatient snort. “I have reason to doubt her ability to sway Ethan. Besides, she would never risk upsetting my parents.”
“And your father already dislikes me, so there is no risk there.” Miranda wanted to know what had come between Ethan and Miss Withers, but she was more concerned about Ethan. She moved to finish her breakfast. “You have missed one thing. I will agree with your brother, so I will not be able to persuade him to stay.”
Jane huffed. “Of course you would agree with him. You always loved him more than you did me.”
Miranda’s spoon stilled over her egg. “Jane, is this why you have been angry with me all this time?”
Jane shrugged. “I knew our friendship would dissolve as soon as he jilted you.”
“It wasn’t like that. You know I love you both.”
“At least you admit that.”
“What?”
“You love Ethan.”
Miranda’s cheeks colored, and she risked the confession. “I have always loved Ethan.”
Jane nudged the edge of the rug under the table with her foot. “I wasn’t sure because of Captain Grant’s interest in you. If you do love Ethan, go to him. Beg him to be careful and return to his family to make peace.”
“And then marry Miss Withers,” Miranda finished for her.
Jane’s bluster seemed to fizzle out, and she lowered her gaze to her half boots. “No, I do not wish that.”
“You don’t?”
“I know I have been horrid,” Jane admitted. “It makes no sense, but your family’s tragedy was mine as well. I know it’s not the same thing, but you were always there for me. We relied on each other. Whatever party I was to attend, I made sure you were invited too before I accepted. Then this happened, and I felt like you betrayed me. You left me alone, and I hated you for it.”
“I couldn’t help what happened!” Miranda said much louder than she’d intended.
“You should have known!” Jane cried. “Your father always did as you asked. You could have stopped him. We could have been sisters!”
Miranda put her hand over her mouth to hold back a sob. Jane’s condemning words reopened an old wound. Miranda would do anything to go back and remedy all her failings. She forced a fortifying breath before she spoke. “I’m sorry, Jane. I should’ve been a better daughter for my father and a better friend for you. I didn’t know how to handle all that transpired, and when I turned to you for help... you sent me away that night like I was nothing to you.”
“I know.” Jane clutched her hands together. “I didn’t know what to do either. It frightened me to involve myself in a scandal. Lady Callister said I have been grieving our friendship through my anger. I don’t want to keep living like this. I hate myself, and you remind me of the person I am not.”
