Page 39 of His Temptation
“But I wasn’t,” he said, much calmer than me. “Youwere the guy I met at the hotel. No point in talkin’ aboutwhat-ifs.”
My emotions pulled me in different directions. One part of me liked that Cason had never been touched by another, and a possessiveness took root, wanting to claim him. But another part of me felt even worse because of it. I was already struggling with Cason’s age and the fact he was my son’s best friend. Having him be a virgin on top of that just made him even more untouchable in my eyes.
“I think you should leave,” I said, despising the words but needing to say them. It was the right thing to do.
“Really, Emery?” Cason got off the bed and walked toward me. “You were ready to fuck me not even two minutes ago, and you certainly didn’t mind giving me head in your office, but now that you know I’m a virgin you don’t want to anymore? That’s not fair.”
“Fair?” I gritted my teeth and closed the gap between our bodies. I gripped the side of his neck, feeling his pulse beneath my palm, and stared into his chocolate eyes. “It’s not fair that I want you, that I want to throw you on that bed and fuck you so hard you’ll feel me for days to come. It’s not fair that I can’t get you out of my damn head, that I know how wrong it is for me to want you, yet I still do.”
“No one is saying you can’t do those things,” Cason whispered, his eyes flickering to my mouth. “Because I for sure wouldn’t mind. The only person stopping you is yourself.”
“And thank god for that.”
If not for my self-control, I’d already have him on his back, begging for more.
“Do you really want me to leave?” he asked. “Because the way you’re holdin’ on to me says otherwise.”
I realized then how close I was holding him, one hand at his neck and the other resting at his lower back, my fingers knotted in his shirt. I quickly let him go and stepped away.
“What’s really bothering you?” Cason’s brows dipped in the center. “Is it really because I’m a virgin? If all guys have that mentality, I guess I’ll be one forever. Either that or I’ll just not tell them.”
“They need to know,” I said. “It can really hurt if they’re not careful. If you bottom anyway.”
Cason blushed. “I think that’s what I’d like. To bottom.” He looked away. “Maybe. Hard to know without trying it.”
Innocent—in more ways than one—and too fucking young at only eighteen. He needed to be with someone his own age, someone who wasn’t divorced and old enough to be his dad.
“Promise me you won’t go and have sex with some random guy,” I said, running a hand through my hair. Frustrated. Whether I was frustrated at him or at the thought of someone else touching him… I wasn’t sure. “It needs to be special your first time.”
Jay had been the first guy I’d ever been with, and he’d treated me amazingly. It had hurt but not nearly as much as it would’ve had he not known to be extra careful.
“Look, my virginity means nothing to me,” Cason said, annoyed. “It’s more of a burden than anything. I just want to be fucked and be done with it. I don’t need romance.”
“But you deserve it.”
Cason stilled, his gaze pinned to me. “How do you know what I deserve, Emery? You barely know me.” He pressed his lips together and glanced at the door. A tic started in his jaw. “Know what? Maybe Ishouldleave. This is going nowhere. You kiss me one minute and reject me the next. The back-and-forth with you has my head all kinds of messed up.”
Why am I doing this?
Cason was of legal age to consent, but him being the same age as Ryan challenged my sense of morality. Much like at work, when I had to juggle my work ethic with my own personal beliefs.
“I’m sorry for confusing you,” I said before exhaling and slowly approaching him. His eyes hardened and he tilted his head. “Truth is, I want you. Even when I push you away, Istillwant you. Ever since that night in the hotel, I can’t get you out of my head.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
“Your age, for one. You being Ryan’s best friend.”
“Is that all?” Cason had a fire inside him, one that simmered in his dark eyes. “Because you overcame that earlier when you sucked my dick. If the virgin thing is the deal breaker, I can totally go fuck someone and change it.”
“No,” I growled.
“You can’t have it both ways,” he said, a smile slowly spreading across his handsome face. “If you won’t fuck me, I’ll find someone who will.”
He clearly knew which of my buttons to push.
“Okay. Let’s say we fuck right now. What about after?” I asked, so close to throwing morals aside and pulling Cason against me—so close to tasting him again.
“What do you mean?” His lips parted as his breathing kicked up a notch.
