Page 35 of Up In Flames
He feels good…solid, yet also fragile…like a beautiful porcelain doll.
As if he can read my thoughts, he whispers, “I won’t break.”
“I might,” I reply, unsure of what I’m actually admitting.
Another minute goes by before Taylor unwinds his arms from my neck. Reluctantly, I let him go as well, and he pulls me down on the couch to sit next to him. He crosses a boot-clad foot over his knee and begins talking.
“How long has it been?” he asks.
“Almost five years now,” I answer with a whisper, preparing to tear myself open.
“How long were you together?”
“Twenty-four years total.”
Realization hits me…Karen and I started dating the year Taylor was born.That feels like some ironic sign…yeah, that you’re too fucking old for him.
“Javi said she left, and you found out by a note on the kitchen counter.”
“Javi talks too much,” I grumble.
“Is it true?” Taylor prods.
“Yeah,” I confirm a second later. “I gave her everything. I thought we were on the same page. Being totally blindsided like that…it reduces you to rubble, tearing you down by destroying your foundation. It left me not knowing how to rebuild, so I just haven’t.”
“And every day, you’re so busy trying to survive that you’ve forgotten how to live, too. Am I right?” Taylor asks like he somehow knows exactly what I’m going through.
“You’re barely old enough to drive,” I laugh without humor. “How could you possibly understand this?”
Taylor shakes his head. “You’re so hung up on age, Knox, but it’s just an indicator of how long you’ve been on Earth, not of what you’ve done with your time here.”Well said, you insightfullittle fucker, I think to myself before he begins sharing a story. “I was seeing an older man a few months back.”
I hold up my hand to stop him. “I don’t think I want to hear where this story is going.”
“Why?” he asks, appearing genuinely confused by my reaction.
As the alcohol settles deeper into my bloodstream, my tongue offers truths I’ve been trying to keep hidden.
“Because I don’t like thinking about you with someone else, and especially because if this story ends with you getting hurt, I might go on a rampage.”
Taylor smiles, and I swear it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
He uncrosses his ankle from his knee, unlaces his boots, and proceeds to crawl onto my lap. His butt is across my thighs and his knees are bent and resting in my armpit as my hands wrap protectively around him like we’ve done this a thousand times before.
“Well, I got hurt,” he confirms, wiggling his ass as he adjusts in my lap. “But now, instead of getting all murdery, you can just squeeze me tighter. Then we both win,” he says before diving back into his story. “I’d known Patrick for years. His son, Liam, and my twin brother, Damon, have been best friends since preschool. Oddly, I often felt like the third wheel with my own twin. But Patrick’s wife died a little over two years ago, and he was struggling badly. Liam lives in a different state, and Patrick was falling apart, so I offered to help in any way I could. That mostly consisted of making sure he ate, took a shower, did his laundry, went to work, that kind of thing, but there were a lot of nights where it was just the two of us, having conversations not unlike this one, and one night, he kissed me.”
As the wordkissedfloats from his mouth, my eyes travel to it.
Suddenly, I know what I want.
I want to kiss Taylor Landry again.
Chapter 14
Taylor
Knox’s fingers dig into the muscles of my lower back as I talk about Patrick. He doesn’t like it, but he needs to know that I understand not being able to let go.
He’s staring at my mouth with hazy eyes, so I place two fingers under his chin and tilt his head up until his eyes meet mine.
